It’s a rare person who doesn’t engage in some sort of gossip at one time or another. Unless you never ever mention what another person is doing, you probably have. You may not have done so to tell things they wanted kept quiet or to broadcast some error they made but when we talk about others, we are gossiping.
Growing up and living in small communities I found myself around gossip a lot. I have also been the subject of gossip a lot since I’m a public figure in the community. Some of the stories that came back to me, wow, had they been true.. Well let’s say, I would have had an exciting life.
At one point during the pandemic I started receiving messages from people that were prefacing their comments by stating they knew I’d been really sick. This was news to me.
I’d been home and quite well since it had started. When I asked if they knew what I was sick with, they said they didn’t know but did know I’d been in the hospital for quite a while. This also was news to me.
The most recent report I got was a call one morning from my neighbour who was relieved to hear me answer the phone. He’d just had a call from someone else who was calling to see if the story he’d heard was true. He’d been told I had died.
Told my neighbour, “Well damn, I’m going to be pissed if I’m not at least invited to my funeral.”
My neighbour immediately called the person back to set him straight. He found out the source of the story. A local organization I headed up and was deeply involved with for several decades.
I’ve not graced the door of the place for a few years now. An element who want to use the place for their own purposes instead of abiding by the mission statement took control and moved to push me and anyone else who would oppose them out the door.
The gossip they were generating about me was to explain why I wasn’t around. Apparently they didn’t care how far they had to go.
That gossip by many standards is pretty mild. Some gossip goes a lot further and can destroy a person’s reputation and standing without any opportunity to defend themselves.
I’ve heard plenty of it coming from around the table over the years. At times when it started into ripping a person apart I'd raise my voice and loudly ask “HOW’S THE WEATHER TOMORROW?” or some other weird ass comment. The conversation would pause momentarily and I’d suggest it was time for a new topic.
I knew full well I only stopped it until I walked out the door. There are some people who live to tear others down. Very few people will oppose them for fear they will become a target.
Far too many people will think nothing of repeating the stories without ever considering the harm they may be doing to someone.
I've probably been just as guilty when the topic has been someone who was not my favourite person. It was wrong of me to do so and I need to do better.
The faster malicious gossip is put aside and other topics discussed the better. In many ways you tear yourself down while tearing others down. Build yourself and others up.
Be supportive to others and when you hear things that doesn’t fit with the person you know, either ignore it or question the truth of it. Don’t just take it as gospel and pass it around.
Shadowspub is a writer from Ontario, Canada. She writes on a variety of subjects as she pursues her passion for learning. She also writes on other platforms and enjoys creating books you use like journals, notebooks, coloring books etc.
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