image generated using Copilot
I am still unable to discuss the topic of sex with my parents; the only discussion I can remember having with them was when one told me to be careful so as not to get a woman pregnant, while the other's fear was that I would pick up some disease and cause them to suffer by having to take care of me. I have not had any form of sex education, not even in school; sex was presented to me as something to fear and be ashamed of, but as I began to understand myself, I had to seek knowledge about sex myself.
From my experience, I will say a parent should educate their children very early on the topic of sex, letting the child understand what sex is and the values and importance around it. Most parents simply tell their children that sex is bad. They should stay away from it.
Some tell their kids, mostly the female kids, that once a person of the opposite sex touches you, you get pregnant immediately, and these children realise on their own that the parents have taught them wrong; they end up not trusting their parents, making the parent unreliable, and causing these children to seek knowledge on the topic outside, turning to peers, the internet, or pornography for information, which rarely give accurate or healthy talks about sex.
A child should be taught about sex as soon as the child can understand what it means. Children are mostly inquisitive, and they tend to ask a lot of questions; it is the responsibility of the parent to teach them and guide them as soon as they become inquisitive about sex, so they do not ask the wrong person these questions outside.
The age of the child, however, determines the information you, as a parent, give the child; just as we are taught in stages in formal education settings, a parent should have something like a curriculum which they should use to teach the child about sex. This will help the parent give the child age-appropriate information.
For instance, in early childhood, the parent could teach the child accurate names for body parts, personal boundaries, and that their body belongs to them. The child should be taught later about puberty, physical changes, emotional development, and other basic biology without shame and later taught about consent, healthy relationships, safe practices, emotional intimacy, and societal values surrounding sex.
Sex education goes beyond the normal talks we get from parents; sex education should prepare you and also give you a better understanding of what sex is, what it is made for and how you should approach it.
A lot of problems in marriages come as a result of little to no understanding about sex. We are advised or made to believe that sex is bad outside marriage growing up, but are not usually prepared for when it is right for us to engage in sex. It is right to state that marriage does not magically flip a switch in people's minds; a lot of people grow up with anxiety, guilt and bad communication skills, which they end up bringing into marital homes, which could have a bad effect on their relationships.
Age-appropriate lessons, open communication, and guiding children through their curiosity rather than shutting it down are precisely the way healthier and better-informed generations are built.
My name is@rishagamo, and this is my response to the Hive Learners weekly featured prompt, week 227, episode 01: “SEX EDUCATION”
