I wish I was never born
That you had made your plan a success by making me go the memory lane as a foetus
Or rather be born as the opposite of what I am
Cause no mattar how much I try
You never see what I really am
For your heart is blocked to that which you believe I am
What do I have to do to make you understand
That my kind of person differs from my sisters ?!
How many miles do I have to travel to prove to you
That i am more of a brother than a sister that deem it fit to walk with it kinds ?!
What do I have to do to make you see
That not every male I walk with do I sleep with?!
What virtue do I still need to reflect
That shows I also believe in the joyful night of blood?!
And that I work strongly all this twenty years towards keeping it till then ?!
I might have gone to a girls' world for my middle education
But it doesn't change the reality that I'm till the girlie boy
That fought alone a battle of sexual abuse with the five years old mind and prevailed
When you or no one was there
And I beg thee
In my quest to be good enough for you
Don't change me to an alligator in a swamp
Or turn my Eros with heart full of love
To gorgon with a hair full of snakes
For every whore was once a saint
And every saint has a future..
Hmm this seems such a hogwash
But it's the hogwash that makes my old man sweat of tears
For the old man that understands...