Those of us who have the pleasure of having children, know how frustrating it can be to see them cry because someone has hurt their feelings ...
So, we realize how important it is to teach them to defend themselves, but if we make the mistake of teaching them to defend themselves with blows, we may be training a potential aggressive, who later will only know how to defend themselves by hitting and humiliating others, by point that one day, it will be you, who is called, because your child exhibits aggressive behaviors.
Which, obviously, will turn you into a vicious circle from which it will hardly be easy to get it out, without getting hurt and really frustrated for not knowing how to defend yourself.
As parents, of the future men and women of the world, we have before our eyes the great challenge of cultivating the proper balance between the heart and the mind.
In my opinion, the best way to protect our children is by teaching how to manage their emotions, so that they can turn them into skillful and useful means for their development and harmonious evolution.
Understanding, harmony, as the proper balance or balance between what we think and feel, that gives us harmony with ourselves and harmony with the environment, which is learning to relate, that is, being able and knowing how to communicate what we feel and what that we think, respecting the rights of others and of course our own rights.
I have always thought that we parents are ultimately the best teachers of our children and the best way to learn is by watching and practicing every day, parents have the opportunity to teach by doing, children learn by modeling, which means becoming heroes or heroines to imitate and not delegating it to the "heroes and heroines" of television.
So what will they imitate? What will they copy? ...
Precisely what we teach them every day with our actions and with our words.
It is clear, surely, that the first who must learn to Cultivate Emotional Balance, we are adults, parents, who today are the example to follow of millions of children, who look at us and at least expect our protection.
Very often, we hear talk and even talk about feelings, emotions and behaviors, as if they were the same and even more so, without knowing exactly what they are? What do we mean? An emotion or a feeling? What differentiates them?
We simply put them in a sack and, as in a “Bingo” game, we take out of the bag that token that we believe is the one that will lead us to sing Bingo!, that token or label that we believe qualifies what is happening to us.
Without pretending to make a psychological analysis of the terms, I will simply approach the conceptualization of these, from the simplest language that can be found in any psychology book on the subject.
In psychology the word feeling is used to define the subjective experiences of individuals and that are the product of their emotions.
We already know that feelings are the result of "emotions" and are a long-lasting affective state.
It is a generic term that refers to the adaptation, by individuals, to stimuli caused by another human being, by an animal, some thing or fact in particular.
In my research I learned that emotional states are caused by the release of hormones and neurotransmitters, which then turn into emotions and later into feelings.
Thus, we get, among these chemical agents in the body: Dopamine, Serotonin, Noradrenaline, Cortisol and Oxytocin, as the main "substances" responsible for our emotions.
Psychology has presented a list of basic emotions namely:
If we continue investigating, we will learn that there are other emotions that are derived from these calls, "Basic Emotions".
In short, it is a broad and complex issue and about which we know little or almost nothing and which paradoxically has a great influence on our lives, at least on our behavior, whether or not to have a "Harmonious Life", which gives us greater options for achieve a state of "Happiness".
Knowing how to manage our emotions does not mean repressing them, when we constantly repress our emotions, we can fall into what psychologists have called "an emotional crisis", but if we do not know how to manage them and we let them take control of our lives and overwhelm us, too we run the risk of finding ourselves in serious trouble.
Definitely, I think that the best way is internal and continuous self-observation of ourselves, in order to know how our emotions affect us and how our mood influences our behavior.
It is, in conclusion, making the daily and constant effort to know ourselves, in order to achieve a state of consciousness of ourselves, it is to stop looking outside, to see inside ourselves.
