I finally visited the Penguins.
This after being aware that they were nearby back in December 2022. If you can believe that.
For some years I wondered why nobody heard me, you know.
Or listened.
Or even asked for my side of the story.
Or asked for my, not so white, life-partner's side of the story.
Instead, a white male was believed and no further investigation was done. And when the folks who had enough power to set the record straight discovered they'd made some mistakes... they went quiet and disappeared.
Now I understand shame, embarrassment and fear pretty well, myself. So no judgement from me, other than the fact that if they were in those positions of authority, their own #UnconsciousBias and #UnconsciousPrejudice and healthy personal #individuation should have been addressed. First.
Before they were put into any kind of position of any kind of authority. And I'm talking about some pretty highly recommended social service folks and mental health professionals as well, to be clear.
So why, do you think, nobody would bother to check or ask either of us and to simply believe one version of events off the bat?
But even when nobody believed me; totally ignored me; or - far worse - listened to me but didn't actually hear me, I continued to stay in my truth.
This was one of the loneliest talks that I've ever had to walk.
I simply couldn't understand how good people could allow bad things to continue to happen, right in front of their eyes.
I began to research and examine the human mind; the human condition; philosophy; history...
I looked everywhere for some answers to enlighten me during this new experience.
Never before, had I witnessed such willful blindness and complete disinterest, to my reality, in all my life. It was astounding!
Or so I thought...
until I was able to see a bit more clearly.
#SystemicRacismExists #SystemicAbuseExists #SystemicSexismExists #WeAreAllResponsible #ItsNotPersonal
But, of course, nobody really wants to talk about this.
So here are some more photos of where the Penguins hang out.
I thought that the photos would look better in black and white.
Kinda like a lie and the truth.
There is no grey area when it comes to the truth or a lie, I think.
But I am learning every day and this part is also very new to me.
So I always remain open to being corrected and learning more about it.
#UnconsciousBiasAndPrejudiceAlmostGotUsKilled
Yeah.
After all that reading and philosophising it came down to this!
But never have I ever taken so long, to cotton on to the other problem I've been encountering for the last few years of trying to rebuild my life!
Who would've thunk?
Oh no. Not me!
Never in a million years would I ever, ever!
#Jung #ShadowWork #Denial #Projection
Well then... I wonder why nobody could see any closer to the truth for all of the years I shared it? Perhaps they didn't believe me, even though I shared the same story consistently.
I wonder why?
I wonder why nobody finds the fact that I'm 52 years old, sleeping on a mattress on the floor part-time after running my own businesses successfully for over twenty years... odd? Or even asks why?
I wonder why nobody, who professes to be into freedom, is vaguely curious that I'm not allowed to move outside of 300kms of a city center that I would prefer to never, ever see again?
Isn't that strange?
Don't you think?
I think it's pretty strange.
You see?
Do you see now? :)
#ItsNotPersonalButItIsImportant
Eh... "the system" doesn't make mistakes and "the system" isn't corrupt. "The system" is an inanimate human construct.
Individuals make mistakes and are corrupt because of ignorance and fear.
#Jung #TheUnconscious #Denial #Projection #ShadowWork
And popular opinion isn't always "right" either. #GalileoGalilei
#WeAreTheSystem #WeAreAllResponsible
But perhaps you think this isn't important because it doesn't really affect you personally...
So a bit more on the mental health side of things and the reasoning behind me continuing to encourage folks to "resist".
#NotAnActivist #ResistYourFear
An excerpt from a book I wrote, sharing free information on mental health...
So in accordance with this more rational, logical and psychodynamic approach to mental health challenges the DSM-I refers to depression as “Depressive Reaction” and has the following description:
The anxiety in this reaction is allayed, and hence partially relieved, by depression and self-depreciation. The reaction is precipitated by a current situation, frequently by some loss sustained by the patient, and is often associated with a feeling of guilt for past failures of deeds. (DSM-I diagnostic and statistical manual: Mental disorders, 1952)
I went on to study C-PTSD and have found, personally (in accordance with the original more psycho-dynamic approach of the original perspective of mainstream treatment for mental health REACTIONS), that my "depression" was actually the Freeze reaction of the Fight/Flight Stress Response.
When I couldn't "flee" a situation that was causing me harm, either obviously or unconsciously, I would move into the freeze reaction / depressive reaction.
I found that "resisting" whatever was hurting me (boundaries work) by tapping into some defiance, continuing to speak my truth (safety first, please), or taking constructive action to change my situation etc. would fix / alleviate the so-called "depression".
i.e It's not necessarily "the system" we need to resist. It's our inability to say no to the things that may be causing us harm. In whatever way that may be. Even thinking a firm "No, that's not right and I'm going to be me anyway" is often enough.
It's not "the system" we may need to resist to avoid becoming "depressed" in other words. It's the pressure to conform and to be what we aren't, which causes us anxiety because we are not accepted as who we are (a threat to our authentic selves), that we may need to resist. Or because we are told to ignore said things and "suck it up buttercup".
Please ask away.
I'm always happy to share my experience.
I've also found that a large amount of unconscious bias and prejudice was the cause of a lot of my "stress", btw.
#SystemicAbuseExists #SystemicRacismExists in my country. And it's very normalized out here in South Africa. So normalized that we have some of the highest femicide rates globally. Yet we women are told we're being dramatic, or outright crazy, when we try to address things.
I'd say the same for any under privileged groups that aren't protected by current systems due to the systemic issues as well.
It's not normal to not feel safe most of the time. #MeToo
And constant stress and lack of validation results in trauma. Which can look like severe mental health conditions. #TheLogic
So, in my experience, James Hillman was spot on. #EnvironmentIsImportant
You can't ignore the environmental reasons that a human being may be suffering with stress reactions. And, in my research, there is no such thing as mental "disorders" or "diseases". This was a clever play on words for insurance purposes.
(Do not come off medications without medical supervision! This is dangerous!)
I hope this makes some sense. I've spent almost eleven years on this journey of discovery and, sometimes, I wonder that people haven't been told of these alternative perspectives.
Not many working medical health professionals even know about the history of their "bible of psychiatry and psychology".
So yes. Resist. Resist the pressure to deny your own experience and feelings. Resist the pressure to avoid dealing with the environmental causes of your stress. Resist the pressure to deny your own reality. <3
That's what all this "resistance" is about.
#BeYou The world will adjust - Albert Einstein
On another note I missed Origin today. :(
Tristan and Adam (Headroom) were playing and I really wanted to go to this one. Monique and Regan put on a hella event and Origin has always been one of my all time favourites.
It'd be good to get back out there, reconnect with old acquaintances and show people that the smear campaign was just that. It always is, you know. I mean... there's no other reason a someone would share a something without the person being around to hear it, really.
More logic. But that pesky unconscious stuff. This is why I now focus on this and this alone. I reckon if we just address this, and the preconceived judgement that goes with it, humanity will be more than halfway to keeping the good vibes going even after the music ends.
Yep. Super bummed I'm still hamstrung financially. #FinancialAbuseExits
It's been too long since I had a boogie on a big dance floor. Fuck knows this is the truth!
But.. sadly... I couldn't afford to go because #CapitalismIsExpensive.
#IgnoranceIsExpensive too, you know.
Yeah... what affects one of us affects all of us.
There's no getting away from this part.
But, don't trust me on this. I'm just a gal, after all.
And I still danced in the kitchen anyway today.
#ShameAndEmbaressmentWillSlowUsDown #OnlyHumanToo #ItsAllGood
#CancelCancelCulture #CancelJudgement
#Coexist 💜
Eternal Seeker
Hardened Dreamer
Mother
Peaceful Warrior
Determined Dancer
and Stargazer
still...
Beyond fear is freedom
And there is nothing to be afraid of.
To Life, with Love... and always for Truth!
Nicky Dee
All images not directly sourced are my own. All photo editing done with GIMP.
