I've been feeling a bit tired lately. If for some reason you have been keeping up with some of my posts as of late, you may have seen me mention a few times that I have been maintaining momentum and really focusing on building a portfolio. This is one that is heavily dominated by both photography and videography. Constantly getting out and roaming around in new places under the sun as I attempt to capture the surroundings in a way that it's something actually marketable. I don't mind doing thing, to be honest. It's something that I deeply love. And I often can't think of anything else I'd rather be doing than being capable of roaming the streets and capturing the world as I explore it. The problem is that as of late I haven't had much energy for anything else. I get home, edit and upload the things I've taken, and then it's about time to sleep. With how busy everything has been I've almost started to evaluate a few things in my life, one of which has been Hive. In this regard, I'm not sure how much longer I'll be sticking around on here. Perhaps I'll start taking some longer breaks. Perhaps those breaks will eventually become something more permanent.
Hive hasn't been as interesting to me for a while now, it's something I've been losing passion for as the time goes on. I can't say I care that much for the investing side of finance anymore, and the prices are something I'm just not really willing to waste my time focusing on from day-to-day. I feel that the more I age, the less interest I have in all of this. Wanting a more simple life with some stability, not trying to chase money in various ways and instead starting to focus on one or two things with more certainty and independence. I think it's a necessary stage in my life with the growing up I've been needing for a while now, something I only came to discover the more I travelled and realised the importance and peace of a more simple life. I wouldn't say I'm old at all, in fact I still consider myself to be very young at the age of 29. I don't think I'm at the point of feeling like age is catching up to me and causing some tiredness. I often hear of people reaching the later 20s and starting to feel some of that fatigue and not being able to keep up like they used to, if anything I feel the opposite of that: I have more ambition, more energy to spend. But I often go so far that I'm pulling that energy out of nowhere as I roam around.
Priorities are starting to make way into my life though. The realisation of how I should be utilising time and preparing for the future. The things that hold more importance over the rest. Building and setting the foundations to projects that could really lead the way to something greater, and the more I evaluate all of those things, the more I realise that the time I put into Hive is more a burden that hinders that potential. And that's conflicting given I do enjoy writing about things and sharing my thoughts each day, especially alongside the photography and videography I do. All those discoveries and roaming around do tend to result in a lot of reflection and ideas. Writing has been something that became a very integral part of my life after I got into the realm of journalism, but that shifted and changed over time and morphed into different areas of interest. Perhaps this too will change and result in something new. I feel I still have an interest in writing things, though this is more pertaining to the realm of photojournalism, something that would be more for me and reaching a wider audience; and the idea of audience here on Hive is something totally different to traditional media.
This isn't to say that I am leaving Hive, that's definitely not what I am saying at all. It's more that I realise that my time here is on borrowed time and that I won't be on here forever. It's something that I will eventually leave and I'm realising that it might actually become a good thing for me to place that attention elsewhere that would benefit me a bit more. Especially with how tired I feel and attempting to juggle everything, definitely things that I feel are more important going forward. It's an exciting time in my life where I do finally feel some direction and I'm aware of the things I want to start doing more seriously, understanding where I want to go and what I want to be. It took me a long time to discover all of this, but it's really exciting to think of what may come ahead in the next few years. How strong I feel about filmmaking and photography, the ways in which I'll push that creativity and find ways to interact with the world through it. Having adventures and sharing stories.
