Every weekend, a group of five men who have been friends would go to the beer pub to have a chit-chat. It was a routine they never thought to leave anytime soon. This meeting started when they were in their final class at the secondary school.
Today, all the bills will be in me.
Jude said in one of their meetings. They guys ordered drinks and cow tail pepper soup. Before long, they started to get tipsy on the intake of alcohol. Usually, Iyke would begin to dance to any rhyme when he gets tipsy. On this occasion, he sat and did not dance. This surprised his friends and they began to look at him from the corner of their eyes.
Why aren't you dancing today? Emem asked him.
Iyke, trying to reply Iyke cleared his throat and said:
Don't you know I am getting old?
Everyone burst into laughter.
At what age are you claiming to be old? Jude inquired.
He dropped his glasses like he was getting serious. Iyke stepped up and moved towards the bartender and asked:
Can I get a stick of cigarettes?
With a surprised look, the bartender gazed at him. He wasn't sure Iyke was in his right senses. None of the guys ever smoked. What could be wrong with Iyke? As he originated over this thought, he went to bring the pack of cigarettes, then opened it for Iyke to pick one.
Lighter, please.
He sparked a lot and dragged the smoke. He could not swallow the smoke and does not want to puff out thick smoke that has not been recycled.
O'l boy, smoking is not easy.
When Jude, Emem, and the other guys saw Iyke with a stick of cigarette, they laughed and Emem jokingly said:
Don't tell me that's the replacement for the forgone dance.
They all laughed over it. The cigarette burnt down with Iyke dragging it any further. It is irritating. The taste and the stress of swallowing the thick smoke down the lungs was not an easy task for the first timer, Iyke. It was the last time he would venture it anyways.
When Iyke looked up, he saw that there were too many ladies in the bar. What the heck are these ladies doing in a bar?. He queried himself. Then spoke to Emem and Jude while Femi sipped from his cup of beer.
Guys, do you know that some of these ladies could be married women?
Jude was going to laugh again but on second thought, he said:
You mean they could be married and hanging out with young men?
They all seemed confused as to why Iyke would just think out loud.
If you doubt me, I can make my thoughts become a reality.
All the guys began to mop up against Iyke. They even told him how he was going to verify his claim.
Just watch as I make my assertion verified.
They all laughed. Iyke took his phone and went to the doorpost of the bar and pretended to be making a call.
Hello, guy! See, you need to come quickly to the OZ bar. Your wife is here with her lover.
It was as if Iyke had triggered an exposure for unfaithful wives. The supposed call was so loud that the ladies sitting in the pub could hear him. Two ladies picked up their bags and began to move out immediately.
Iyke's friends couldn't believe their eyes. So, it is true that some of the ladies were married.
Iyke returned to the table and told the guys:
That's not all. There are some more. Just wait and see what happens next.
Again, Iyke stepped towards the bar counter and made another anonymous call.
My guy! Where are you now? Come and see your girlfriend at the OZ bar with another guy.
As soon as he ended the fake call, five ladies, sitting differently with some guys, hurriedly left the bar.
Then, the guys started to laugh uncontrollably.
Iyke the hardest giver that ever liveth.
Today is a different ball game. You refused to dance but you cracked a nut we all never thought was real.
It was a funny game Iyke played but it turned out to be real.