when I was younger, I was quite fleshy and a bit plumpy, those who never knew my age, came up with a hasty conclusion. They didn't know how old I was, but judging by my dad's height, they quickly assumed that I will never be taller than I was, even though I was only a year ten old kid.
My dad was quite brief in height. Maybe because we bore some kind of facial resemblance, they were quick to conclude that our height would be same.
When I play with my peers; kids who were few years older than me or those I was few years older than, I will come under serious scrutiny by neighbours who were adult.
One specifically said;
"I can't believe that this boy will be playing like this at this age", another concurred. That's how they will open a fresh round of gossips on my account.
I didn't understand what they meant because we just moved into the compound then. Prior to our movement to the neighbourhood, they knew me from nowhere.
Their words got me thinking.
"Shouldn't I be playing?"_ "What's the difference between me and those kids I was playing with"
Just so many questions without answers bumping into my then innocent mind.
Their words haunted me for a while. I couldn't play with my peers the way I would've love to. The free-spiritedness, usually associated with kids was taken away from me. I became overly careful and self conscious whenever I was with my peers. I knew that if something were to go wrong along the way, I would be singled out scolded with so much disdain, an energy whose source I can't ascertain till date.
As fate would have it, I outgrew my dad in height. I took after my mum, who is a bit tall. I'm even few inches taller than her.
I remember meeting one of my age and height determiners some years later, and she looked at me carefully, in disbelief, without uttering a word. She eventually got over her bewilderedness and managed to say, "so this is who you wanted to become?" Funny human being.
I gave off that slightly cocky smile, and spoke to her with some air of maturity.
Since she wasn't someone I could request that we do lunch or dinner with later (I mean, we had nothing to catch up on, save her toxicity), I had to quickly excuse myself and swagger away with so much confidence, and with my shoulders held high. I didn't hear a footstep behind me, so I guess, she stood gazing at me, while I put up a big boy show for her to watch.
She wanted me to act grown then, I had to up a little bit of grown a*** sh** for my guest.
I'm not a person who carries loads of negative energy around, I might have dump such memory long time ago.
I'm writing this because I recently heard that familiar word; "*you're playing like this at your age*?"
It was spoken to a kid who was joyfully jumping around with other kids. I felt a certain urge of walking down to the lady who made that statement to tell her how demoralizing those words were to me, when I was a kid.
But one thing I so much enjoyed about this particular scenario was that the kid whom those words were spoken to, paid deaf ears, infact she increased the tempo of the play. The volume of their chatter and laughter was increasing with the level of the lady's nags.
The nagging lady was obviously frustrated.
I was grinning from where I was sitting, I felt like cheering on the little girl who was being scolded.
I know that kids could be mischievous, in fact there's a level of mischievousness in every normal child, but we should not end up taking away childhood from children, in the process of trying to correct them.
We must learn a less harmful and damaging way of addressing and correcting children.
I'm of the opinion that people should be allowed to be lively and playful as long as they can.