Chika was sitting on her bed when she received the email. She had been checking her phone since morning, waiting for the scholarship result. When the notification finally came in, she quickly opened it, hoping to see good news.
Unfortunately, her name wasn't on the list.
She read the email again, thinking maybe she had missed something. She even checked the list of successful applicants twice, but the result remained the same. She had not been selected.
She dropped her phone on the bed and stared at the ceiling. She didn't feel like talking to anyone.
She had spent almost four months preparing for that scholarship. She checked the requirements, gathered her documents and spent hours writing her application. She even asked a friend to help her read through her personal statement before submitting it.
She wanted that scholarship badly because she knew how difficult things were at home. Her parents were doing their best to pay her school fees and take care of other family needs. Sometimes, she felt uncomfortable asking them for money, even when it was something important.
The scholarship would have taken some of that burden away.
When she finally told her mother about the result, her mother tried to encourage her.
"Don't worry, my daughter. There will be another opportunity. You can try again next year."
Chika smiled and nodded, but she wasn't happy. She had already made plans in her head. She thought about how things would be different if she got the scholarship. She would be able to continue her education without worrying too much about money.
Now, she had to start thinking again.
For the first few days, she avoided conversations about the scholarship. Whenever her friends asked if she has received any news, she simply told them she wasn't selected.
One of her friends, Ada, called her one evening.
"Have you started preparing for the next application?" Ada asked.
"Not yet. I haven't even recovered from this one," Chika replied.
Ada laughed and told her not to take the rejection too seriously. According to her, there was always another chance, and she could do better next time.
Chika understood that her friend meant well, but she wished people would understand that applying for scholarships wasn't as easy as they made it sound.
She had spent money processing documents, buying data and getting other things ready. She had also spent a lot of time preparing. It wasn't something she could just repeat without thinking about the cost.
A few weeks later, she heard that another girl in her department had received the same scholarship. The news made her feel happy for the girl, but she also wondered what that girl had done differently.
She checked the scholarship website again and read through the selection requirements, she started thinking about what she could improve if she decided to apply again.
She even wrote down some things she wanted to do differently. Perhaps she needed more volunteering experience. Perhaps her personal statement wasn't strong enough. She couldn't tell exactly what went wrong.
Then, another scholarship opportunity came up.
This time, she applied without telling many people. She didn't want to explain herself to everyone if things didn't work out. She gathered her documents, wrote another application and submitted it before the deadline.
When the results came out, she wasn't selected again.
This time, she didn't cry or spend the whole day checking the list, she simply closed the page and continued with what she was doing.
Her younger brother noticed her silence that evening.
"Sister, didn't you apply for that scholarship?"
"I did, but I didn't get it."
"Will you try again?"
Chika looked at him and smiled.
"I don't know yet."
That night, she sat with her notebook and started making other plans. She searched for schools with lower fees, asked about part-time jobs and spoke to someone who knew about local scholarship programmes.
She realised that she had spent so much time waiting for one good result that she had barely considered other ways to continue her education.
She wasn't going to abandon her dream because two applications had failed. But she also wasn't going to keep spending money on applications without making other plans.
When her mother asked whether she would apply again the following year, Chika said she would think about it.
This time, she wanted to be more prepared, but she also wanted to have other options.
She still kept the scholarship requirements in a folder on her laptop. She hadn't deleted them or thrown away her documents. However, she no longer checked the website every morning or counted down the days to another application.
There were other things she needed to attend to.
Maybe another opportunity would come. Maybe she would get the chance she had been waiting for. But until then, she had decided not to put her entire life on hold.
Image is by Google Gemini.