Being a teacher, I see day by day an interesting occurrence. If a student likes a piece, he/she has much more inspiration and comes to the lesson with a smile. Positivity can be smelled in the atmosphere! Achieving a goal seems so easy with these two words! And it is. At the same time, we can say that this feeling is contagious, and you have the perception that the world is under your feet. Thoughts and their accomplishments just can come so easily, bringing even more of those aforementioned words. Positivity. But what happens if some not-so-positive event is the source of inspiration. What can it bring?
My weekend passed so quickly, and I am sure many can say the same. Half of the ideas and plans we could not materialize, some unexpected conditions maybe didn't allow us to do all that we wanted. Maybe, focus lacked, or simply the connection between the plans and real dedication failed. But, even the weekend is over and we are heading into a new week full of work, music, and events connected to it should not be forgotten.
What I also can not forget is one event that happened so many years ago. We are going now back to 1997, a year when I participated for the first time in a big international competition. Piano competition. I already had some experience with festivals and competitions, but this one was a serious thing. I remember that it was very recommended to participate in those kinds of competitions (I don't like them now) as it was bringing a reputation both to the teacher, and the student. If the result is good. If not, probably nobody remembers it, only the booklet is witnessing your participation and instead of recognition, you get a bit of frustration. The amount of frustration depends on you, who practiced for some months the same pieces, on average for several hours a day.
When the day of the performance comes, you have two options: Stay calm and give your best or get into a panic state. Who would not choose the first option? Everyone would opt for the first one, right? Just probably not the one that has to step in front of the jury and a huge audience room, even if it is a competition held behind closed doors. No audience. Just the scene, a piano, and a jury. Easy as pie, you practiced a lot, the same as so many other students that are competing with you. But that little bug that you can not control in your head comes and remove your memory at a certain moment. You mess up, as you are having a memory block. Yes, those things happen if you don't know the techniques for how to manage your inexperienced mind. You should continue and finish the whole performance where you played the English Suite in G minor composed by Bach, a study called Ab Irato by Franz Liszt, a study in C sharp minor by F. Chopin, and Rigoletto Paraphrase by F.Liszt. {I liked to play compositions by Liszt those years}. And that is what I did, played until the last note, but that Bach, that first piece I played... and messed up the text... changed the mind and the rest of my participation. Inspiration? More like just finishing it as soon as possible and getting myself away from that scene. Did I say how much I dont like piano competitions :D ?
I don't really want to call back those feelings I had then, but basically, imagine it like a feeling that you don't ever want to play in any other competition...until your teacher, the very next year convinces you to do so. But you have learned a lesson, and the negative experience you try to convert into a positive one. And you are one year older. You go calmly, have time to try the piano, the room, warp up properly and accommodate yourself with the space. A very important thing for me. Have physical contact with the piano I will play on and the mental spacing of the concert/competition room. Well, then the story finished differently and I was not just happy, but ten times more than that. I enjoyed my participation fully.
I think we all got the message that a negative experience can be turned into a positive one, or it was the moment (well, one year) that made things seem so different. Well, everyone can pick the preferred version, but I have to go back a bit again to the topic of competitions in music. They are important, as they are a source of motivation for the student but on the other hand, it is not a very healthy thing to compete in music. What we are measuring? Who is better in technique, musical expression, scene behavior, mental strength, style...? All that is important for a musician, yes, but if he/she is not heading to be a world-famous one who needs all this in its curriculum, why do teachers force encourage students to take part in competitions? It is not to be measured in some numbers and points you win, however, experience counts. Oh, yes, and as I said it can be a source of inspiration and motivation for young people to practice more! How good I am not anymore young so no more competitions for me :)
Special request: Please don't ask me to play some of these compositions now, I am not anymore in that shape to play them :)
...and a P.S. : The cover image is a photo I took in one exhibition. A detail from a painting, a woman walking on some undefined surface. What it could be? Water? Memories? Alien planet? Thoughts?
Whatever the painter wanted to say, for me it was wandering into the past!