The year is coming to an end, it's only important and shows the sign of gratitude to reflect on how the year has been to know where and how to make changes for a better next year. I've been thinking of how I spent the year 2025 and somehow I began to think of some things I will not think about normally on the end of a year.
My thoughts long before now, what I thought I'd be by now... As a child under the care of my dad who I thought had so much freedom to do whatever he liked since he was an adult, I wished and couldn't wait to be an adult myself. I thought a lot about how I'd be a free adult lady who is able to cater for her needs and be a great lady.
I saw myself in a medical coat, treating and saving lives in a reputable hospital. I saw a lady that her voice is heard across a part of the world, singing and making melody to God and to impact lives. I saw myself confidently trying out new things because I am an adult, being the best in my studies and stepping up in my education field.
Even as far to who I marry, the kids I'll have and the way I'll raise my own family to be the best I was yet to see in families back then, the little me thought about all that. I thought I'd be a beautiful, kind and thoughtful mother and wife that knows just how to serve God doing great things with her family. A lady making a lot of money, no wants.
What I didn't think of back then about who I'd be was, there will be unexpected situations, bad experiences, life twists and God's own plan that would impact me to rethink who I should become, a better and wiser plan. Of course, some thoughts I had of myself still stand and I'm becoming who that lady is but with a wiser heart.
Today, I'm becoming a lady who is learning from her past, more aware of her present, and planning positively for the future. Emotionally, I'm more mature than years ago and some things don't hurt as they did before, some actions taken are well thought out. There are still mistakes I regret but they don't hold me back like they did before.
Practically, I keep wanting to be more intentional about the things I do. A new year is coming and I've got resolutions because I want to be intentional about how I start my year. I may fall behind at some point but I plan to remind myself the reasons I started and I'll continue again. Life is practical and I plan to keep it that way for me.
I may not be who I had thought I'd be by now but it's not a story of failure, it's a story of learning and redirection towards a better version of myself. What matters is how I see myself and the definition of success I believe, appreciating the little things I've achieved and the life that I have.
Image used is AI generated.
