I heaved a sigh of relief as I threw myself out of the fierce sunshine and into the warm bosom of the Beer Shop.
Inside was cool and dim and the comforting figure of the Bear-Man looked over from the counter.
Ey-up.
He said, like a giant chewing rocks.
Aye aye.
I acknowledged in return.
He nodded and I did too.
Man stuff dealt with, I turned and started to peruse the shelves of bounteous beer before me. There were lots of new cans and bottles. The variety was quite mind-boggling.
It made me giggle slightly to think that when I first started reviewing beers that I worried about running out of funky ones to review. No chance of that.
In the shadows, something shifted...
I didn't bother slipping into a fighting stance. Not this time, for I knew that once again, it was the Bear-Man, slipping out from behind his counter as if it were an overly tight pair of trousers.
You like havin yer boundaries challenged?
He asked with an innocent-looking smile lurking pinkly behind his thatchy beard.
Do I bloody well what?!
I sputtered.
After all. It was not a seemly question to ask a fellow man. Was he implying he might challenge a boundary by whipping out his chocolate cosh and attempting to cudgel me with it?
Boundaries. Sometimes it's good to challenge them. You know, Wander Beyond?
He made a strange fingering motion in front of his beard as if he were massaging a massive teat for milk.
I stared, aghast. Wander beyond? Beyond what. Beyond the realms of decency? Had this man no shame? I did not come here every Friday to be poked with someone's bangstick.
I came for the beer.
I opened my mouth to protest all of this out loud.
I mean, I know you like um hot?
Bear-Man said with a knowing wink.
Hot? HOT? Was he now attempting to sell me the hiding of the beef budgie as something beneficial to warm me up. Well, it was bloody well warm enough thank you very much.
I would rather not.
I said primly, as if trimming the stems of flowers to fit in a nice vase.
Aw, you sure? Look. It's got Chillies, Cinnamon and Ginger in it aaand it's strong as fuck. I thought it be right up your street?
He produced a can, a colourful thing proclaiming to be La Catrina from Wander Beyond Brewing. He pointed to a nearby poster which was emblazoned with the words.
Challenge Your Boundaries with Wander Beyond's one-offs and innovative beers.
I made a smumphing face.
Aye alright then. Give me it.
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