Have you ever wondered the number of times you have let unpleasant emotions get the better of you? That moment of rage when everything else does not matter and you just feel like doing unimaginable things? Well, I bet you cannot count. We are all human anyway and it is just a natural feeling. Everyone just have different responses to anger and that is the difference between us.
Anger is unpredictable and can make you do "IMPOSSICANT" things. Actions taken at the peak of that moment are often disastrous. There are only two things that can stop extreme actions influenced by anger:
Self discipline in this wise, means self control. ability to restrain oneself without letting emotions spur you into action. The second one is actually a funny one that we all have experienced at one point or the other. Let me be a bit more clearer, A simple example;
Some years ago, I had his annoying friend that would constantly get on my nerves. On this particular day, I was extremely infuriated and I didn't think twice before picking up this huge stone. I spent the next few minutes chasing him around but he did well to outrun me. Had it been I had got within aim rage, I could have killed someone.
I ran and ran until I grew tired and disposed the stone.
ANGER CAN MAKE YOU DO OR SAY UNIMAGINABLE THINGS
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You will be fearless
It is of no doubt that we also have been victims of circumstances, circumstances that kept us at bay during a moment of rage. Your crush is probably around, people are calming your nerves or as I stated up there, target out of reach. When any of these happens, we often sit down to devise a plan that would "satisfy" the rage. In clearer terms, we look for ways to get back at the cause of the temper. Could be physical or emotional. Either way, it doesn't end so well. Here are two real life stories.
THE PHYSICAL
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Francis (NOT REAL NAME) woke up to the loud arguments of his next door neighbour. Paul and his wife had gotten into their routine rows that early morning. It was 1/1/2018. In no time, Francis rushed to the scene and tried to separate the couple but all his efforts proved abortive. Out of frustration, he blurted out
" Before you guys got here, we never had trouble sleeping. Is it only you and your wife? You are always at loggerheads"
Those words struck Paul and it subsequently escalated the fight. Paul and his wife forgot their differences and fought in unison against Francis. This drew the attention of more neighbours who swooped in to settle the fracas. Both parties apologized to another and the matter 'died'. Unknowing to Francis, Paul nurtured his anger and he hatched a plan. He broke into Francis' house while he slept and hacked him. Poor Francis struggled for dear life but he was no match for the raging Paul. Did I mention that Francis had a wife? Well she's a widow now with three kids to take care of. What a start to the year huh? A red letter day for the family. No thanks to anger.
I bet life would ever be the same again for Francis' family. Especially new year, a time which should be of celebration would constantly be a reminder of the horror that had taken place.
THE EMOTIONAL
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At that moment, nothing except your feelings matters
People get angry and in order to get back at the other party, they mock their shortcomings. Nothing can ever be more disappointing than that.
There can be forgiveness but the words will always keep ringing
It is often when the damage as been done and the culprit (anger) simmers down that regret sets in. Just come to think of it. A guy is bluntly told
Little wonder you are a sickle cell patient
Just because of a disagreement. Now forgiveness can be done but those words can not be forgotten. A grave mistake that may never be corrected.
A guy recently sought for advice. He had just insulted his aunt. Mocked rather. He had just mocked her unmarried status over a mere disagreement and has left the aunt heartbroken. In such a case, one would begin to wonder if he had always been happy about her spinster tag or never cared about her. Truth is, those words were never intended nor envisaged. It all started with a flare of temper
IT BEGETS GRUDGES
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Grudge, just as defined by the dictionary
A persistent feeling of ill will or resentment resulting from a past insult or injury
People can hold grudges for as long as 50years while others barely keep it for a day. It all boils down to the mindset. On a closer look, grudges do more harm than good (If there's any good at all). The sad part is, the so called enemy might even be unaware and you are just the one fighting an artificial emotional battle.
A logical syllogism isn't it?
Emancipate yourself from self imposed slavery
THE BLAME GAME
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As humans, we are always scared to face realities and own up to responsibilities. We tend to trade blame games. What we must learn however, is that no one is ever going to answer for us. The heavy responsibility rests solely on the basis of our actions.
"It was the devil"
" I heard a voice"
" I don't know how it happened"
These are common phrases used by those who have opted to take the longer route around the truth. Actions are actions. Whether influenced by anger or happiness, one thing is sure: the responsibility has never for once crossed the ambit of our discretion . Anger is always, and has always been a ticking time bomb.
© Ogundare Opeyemi
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