The Power Of The Intermerweby

In today’s high tech world, even the simplest of people have the power, and the world's knowledge at the very tips of their fingers. So in 2019 I can use a thing called the intermerweby, to find the answers to life's most perplexing questions along with solutions to the universes most puzzling dilemmas. And yet here I sit, with all this power googling what happened to the Teletubbies. Now I know many people are reading this scratching their heads thinking, ” but what did happen to the Teletubbies”? So I’ve completed a thorough investigation using my intermerweby super powers, just for you. No need to thank me.
In 2016 Laa Laa was found in Bradford sleeping rough in a doorway to Ladbrokes. Sadly she lost her hard earned fortune from Children’s television on a horse named Big Tits, who was racing in the 1:15 Royal Ascot. The fame had obviously taken its toll along with an on going court case regards failure to pay tax while working on Children’s television. She was found to be high on Meths and could clearly be heard shouting “DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM” at the community support officer while she was taken into care. In 2019 it’s believed she is back on the streets after the new Universal credit system kicked in. I should point out for legal reasons that Laa Laa was found not guilty of any tax avoidance as she was just using an investment in real estate using loopholes in government legislation that came highly recommend by her accountants.
2015 Tinky Winky turned out to be the worst kept secret in the House of Commons as it was common knowledge among MP’s she was having an affair with Boris Johnson. The secret was very nearly let out the bag six months into the relationship after the pair were spotted walking out of the playboy club London hand in hand. Tinky Winky then had one of her Famous diva moments punching a photographer in the face before being ushered into the back of a car and driven off followed by the press on motorcycles. There was a full media blackout put in place by the government which is why it didn’t appear on the six o clock news. However the photographer retired to a tropical island later that year with an undisclosed out of court settlement while an official source from Number 10 has claimed the Prime Minister is looking into an unusually large quantity of tubby custard all over Boris Johnson’s expense forms.
Po tried to make it as a gangster rapper but for reasons she couldn’t understand coming from a famous gang on the telly was unable to get a record deal. Sadly this sent Po of the rails as she went about trolling a number of successful gangster rappers while failure then depression sank in. In 2012 she was arrested for shoplifting as footage was shown from security cameras as she walked into a store, picked up a flat screen telly, then holding it in front of her tummy casually walked out the store. It is said over the many years she had been getting away with it she had single handily brought down the Comets electrical goods store just to feed her tubby custard habit. She was released from prison in 2017 and it was clear as she emerged from the prison she had piled on the weight. Then in 2018 she had to be rushed into hospital which took sixteen firemen to lift her out the ninth floor of her flat in Enfield North London after overdosing on tubby custard.
Dipsy was the only member of the group, who after many years in children’s television managed to rehabilitate into life outside the television studio going on to form a successful career as a stripper. She can be found stripping wallpaper for the family owned painting and decorating business Monday to Friday. While being a very private little Tellytubby it is said at the weekend she likes to paint pretty pictures painting under an anonymous name, Banksy. There have been several rumours of her appearing on Ant and Dec’s I’m a celebrity get me out of here and videos emerged on YouTube of her parked in a disabled bay outside Bargain Booze having an argument with a traffic warden. Local people say she can often be seen aggressively driving a white transit van with ladders on the roof around the Luton area while on the phone.
So there we have it, The power of the intermerweby is in your hands to look into anything your little heart desires. It is off course one hundred present accurate and true in every factual way. However there may rarely be a subject that you cannot find anywhere, no matter how hard you look. If this is the case then you can always make your own story up and publish it on Wikipedia. It’s what I did with the Teletubbies.