Hello everyone! Friends of hive. Today I just want to tell you things. I love it here because I can express myself and this piece has a lot of meaning for me.
These days, these weeks, I have not been well.
My anxiety is much higher, so much so that I feel like my heart is beating out of my chest, or so much so that I want to vomit. However, I have always clenched my jaw. It is a reflex action resulting from my constant anxiety. Today, it was so much that I decided to drain my anxiety by doing what I do best and that is drawing.
But why?
I am very hard on myself and I think I am not enough. I resent myself for being 25 years old and not bringing sustenance to this house. It's me, I attack myself and my best friend made me realize it.
It's this incessant feeling of being a complete worthless. I feel like I'm letting myself down and letting down my mother and my siblings and my friends and everyone. And I find myself keeping quiet, I'm not able to tell anyone but my twitter regarding my situation.
What do I wish for? I wish the voices in my head would shut up forever, I wish I could bring home sustenance, that my little sister and my mom and myself would be proud of myself, I want to live a life with a relaxed jaw.
I am not here to tell you about the process, however I captured it almost in its entirety for you to see. I don't feel like telling, I've just been very sad and anxious. I've been crying all day and during the process of this illustration, so.... Here you go.
This is how far I was able to capture the process. My head is very messy.
I sincerely hope you like it and that you relax your jaws because you can ruin your teeth.
I love you, hive friends. See you next time.
