It's been a long break (again), longer than ever before. But I haven't disappeared, I have just faced some health challenges and really had to take it very easy for the last 2 months. I'm starting to feel better and I'm very grateful for that. I keep learning to listen more and more to my body but to be honest, lately, it's been painful, also on an emotional level. I can't help but feel that my life is moving forward in the direction I want but at a very slow pace and it's a challenge for me to accept that. Sometimes I have the feeling that my life is slipping away and all my dreams are yet to be realized. But maybe not in this lifetime.
Anyway, I have better days as well. And I keep reminding myself
If you can dream it, you can achieve it.
Something that sure helps me is the fact that the worst part of the winter now is over. It's been freezing here (actually much colder than it has been for years even though this is the first winter I'm spending in Sweden in 4 years). Over the last week, the temperature has shifted from -10 degrees Celsius to 10 degrees Celsius. That's crazy and doesn't feel normal. Today on my walk I spotted these flowers already, it's not even the end of February...
Since the pandemic just continues my plans to sell my flat and move from Stockholm for good are postponed. Now I'm planning to stay here at least until the end of the summer. What I'm missing the most at the moment are physical meetings. Seeing my friends in real life. It's not easy to meet new people with all the restrictions in place. At least I'm dating a bit. But apart from that my social life is on zoom. I don't want to complain though. I know I'm not alone in this situation of course. All I'm saying is that it's starting to take its toll. I'm a person who often chooses to spend time on my own. But at the moment it's not only by choice. I feel lonely here. And that was also why I left Stockholm 5 years ago.
But of course, I don't want to get lost in my feelings of loneliness. It's good to focus on what I do have in my life and that I really have so much to feel grateful for. And I know I'm on a path, a path of healing and love.
And the person you always can shower with love is yourself.
I know it sounds a bit cheesy but it's so true. I'm almost done with my core certification in my coach training and this year I'll dive into my so-called majors, what I'll specialize in and what will become my niche as a sex, love, and relationship coach. And it's Conscious Dating and The Jade Egg. I want to help women find true love and I want to use the Jade Egg as the main tool in my coaching. This egg has really transformed my life in so many ways, I should probably write more about that soon.
And I feel truly happy about the fact that I now have the energy again to keep moving forward with my coaching business. It's frustrating that I can't do it full time but step by step I'll get there.
And I'm happy to realize I have come such a long way. My confidence as a coach is better, still a lot I need to work on but definitely a big shift over the last couple of months. And that's because I have practiced. Practice makes perfect.
I'm currently reading The Prosperous Coach by Steve Chandler and Rich Litvin and find a lot of the content to be very inspiring, like this:
The Struggling coach has huge dreams that overwhelm them.
The Pro coach has huge dreams, and takes tiny steps every day.
The Struggling coach thinks confidence is a requirement before taking action.
The Pro coach knows that confidence is result of taking action.
And I'm doing that, I take tiny steps every day. Action steps that give me confidence. Actually writing about this makes a difference, I realize how much I'm already doing. It's hard work but I have finally found something I'm happy to work hard for.
I guess what I wanted to say is that it's important to remind ourselves of what we already have in our lives and how we can choose to look at a situation. Even through challenging times, it's always possible to focus on what's good and find ways to work towards our goals. And it's important to have dreams, so important. So I'm deeply grateful for dreaming so big and making such bold claims.
I also find inspiration in this quote.
Whatever you are looking for is looking for you too.
ā S Williams
I have to show up though, of course, for my dreams to come and find me. And I have no plan not to keep doing so.
Thanks for reading š
Love and blessings to you all š
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