Everyone has a need to feel love. It is part of the human experience, and it is wired into our very being. We all need love, but why is it that some of us feel that love differently? Why is it that some of us respond better to acts of service? Why do others begin to have tears if someone speaks kind words to them? The answer lies in the work of Dr Gary Chapman, and what he calls The 5 Love Languages.
Acts of Service
Has anyone ever swept your floors, or worked on your car and you felt like a million bucks? One of your love languages may be Acts of Service. Folks with this attribute are often industrious themselves and don’t sit around too long.
Words of Affirmation
When someone tells you how beautiful you are, how do you feel? If someone looks you in the eyes and says what a kind, joyful, and amazing human being you are, how do you feel? People who have a love language of words are some of the sweetest people you will ever meet.
Receiving Gifts
Remember that time when you gave your friend a gift and their whole world lit up? They smiled, laughed, cried and gave such a reaction you knew that they felt loved and adored. People who enjoy receiving gifts can be some of the most generous people you ever meet. They often enjoy parties, both throwing parties, and walking into a room where they are now the center of attention.
Physical Touch
Folks who enjoy physical touch are pretty easy to spot. They are the ones always giving hugs, rubbing your shoulder, or patting you on the back as they smile at you. While this love language can have its downfalls for some, it can also be one of the most endearing. A good solid bear hug is something that one does not easily forget.
Quality Time
Do you recall those times sitting on your front porch and passing the time with a dear friend? Did you ever visit family and sit in the den or loving room for hours just chatting the night away? Quality Time is a gift to this high tech age where we do not always have high touch circumstances. Despite distances, or lack of physical contact, quality time can be experienced with a simple phone call or a hand written note we receive in the mail.
We generally have a primary love language, and a secondary love language. However, it is possible to have more than one secondary love language, especially as we learn to give and receive love in these ways.
For me, my primary is words of affirmation, and my two secondaries are touch, and quality time. You will often see me investing time with people, listening to their words carefully and searching for encouragement to share with them. It is how I feel love, and it is how I give love.
What about you? Did you relate to any of the love languages? Do you know which love languages are yours?
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