Many people feel they should have their lives completely sorted out when they’re still young. “What do you want to be when you grow up?”; “Which major will you choose?”; “What’s next, college or career, and what job do you envision five or ten years from now?”
These questions sound casual but can put tremendous stress on people who are still finding themselves.
To tell you the truth, I do not think people must have everything straightened out from a young age. We grow, our thoughts and beliefs evolve and so do our interests and passions. One can decide on a major during high school, start college with this idea of a specific profession, and yet discover after several courses that he or she is more passionate about something entirely different. Another person may graduate and not have a clue about what to do next in life, and this does not necessarily mean he or she has failed to plan.
Some in the society create an impression of a linear path where some people graduate from college, find “the” dream job, successfully attain it, and achieve financial freedom while maintaining a smooth ride.
The truth we don’t always hear and see is the amount of struggle, doubt, wrong turns, and transitions involved behind the scenes. Comparing ourselves to such linear portrayals sets many up to feel that they aren’t on track, when they really are just moving at their own speed. I am also firmly convinced that there is inherent value in spending time figuring things out.
Experimenting different experiences, meeting various types of people, making mistakes, and even embracing uncertainty provides far more profound insights about oneself than rigidly sticking to a predetermined blueprint. We don’t always have to know the final destination to take the next step. Knowing a possible general direction is enough sometimes.
All in all, I think it would be much healthier for many of us to see our life not as a checklist to be completed but rather as a journey to be embarked on, a journey where it is okay to not have everything figured out but it’s imperative to be willing to learn, adapt, and keep moving.
Our destinations may change, and changing our minds does not imply we’ve lost our way, but rather that we have grown and have a better idea of where we want to head next.
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