I honestly think one of the biggest pressures we put on young people is the expectation that they should know exactly what they want to do with their lives at a very young age.
You finish secondary school and suddenly everybody is asking, "What do you want to study?"
You say you don't know, then they look at you like something is wrong with you, "How can you not know?"
But honestly, how are we supposed to know? At 16, 17 or even 18, some of us are still trying to understand ourselves, we are still discovering what we like, what we are good at, what we don't like and what kind of person we even want to become, yet somehow, we are expected to choose a course that could potentially determine the direction of our entire lives.
And once you choose it, everybody expects you to stick with it.
I don't think life works that way, sometimes you choose something because you think you will love it, only to discover along the way that it isn't for you, sometimes you study something because your parents wanted it, sometimes you choose a career because everybody says it has money in it, then years later, you realise that you are not even happy doing it.
So what happens then? Are you supposed to continue because you already spent years doing it? I don't think so, I think people should be allowed to change their minds...
The funny thing is that we also put so much pressure on ourselves because of how we look at other people and feel like we are behind in life, you see someone you went to secondary school with is already married, another person has a good job, another has started a business, another has travelled out of the country, and suddenly you are wondering what exactly you are doing with your own life.
My dear, life is not a race, at least, I don't think it should be...
Everybody has their own timing, now, does that mean we should just relax and do nothing because we still have time?
No.
That's where I think the balance comes in, yes, you do not need to have everything figured out, but you still need to be moving somehow, you can explore, you can learn new things, you can try something and realise it is not for you, you can start again.
Because time really does fly.
One minute you are a child and the next thing you are sitting down wondering where all those years went, so yes, I understand why people say we don't have forever to figure things out, but I also don't think rushing because you are scared of time is the answer.
Sometimes rushing into a career, relationship, business or even a major life decision just because you feel like you are getting old can create bigger problems later.
For me, I think the goal should not be to have everything figured out early, the goal should be to keep figuring yourself out as you go.
You can have plans, definitely. Have goals, have dreams and work towards them, but also leave room for life to surprise you.
Maybe what you wanted at 18 won't be what you want at 25, maybe the career you thought was your dream won't be your dream anymore... Just maybe you will discover something completely different that you never even imagined doing.
And that is okay, we are human beings, not machines programmed with one particular destination.
So if you are young and you don't know exactly what you are doing with your life yet, honestly, welcome to the club.
Just keep learning, keep trying, keep moving and don't be afraid to change direction when necessary, You don't have to know the whole journey, sometimes, knowing the next step is enough.
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