I got here on Steemit by way of Empire.Kred (formerly Empire Avenue) which I found by way of social media friends on Klout and Twitter (5 years ago), and I’m stumbling around on steemit and kryptonia now in the same sloppy, ineffectual way that I did when I launched “LeftyRonbo” (the name I brought with me from Gas Buddy of all places) on the old Empire Avenue when Dubs was still there and Kevin Greene’s stock sold for 700 and change in eaves.
I made mistakes, screwed up mission completions, got blocked, got schooled in comments on my profile, but I stuck with it and after much trial-and-error, I got to the point where I could say that I had the hang of it. But I’ve always remembered that Newbie experience. It’s more challenging on some social media sites than others, and there always feels like there is a lack of information or concrete directions. It feels a lot like driving in city traffic when everybody but me knows where they are going.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not complaining. There is a joy, an enthusiasm, a sense of wonder, a tantalizing curiosity that accompanies being lost and having to explore ways to find yourself in the strange environment that you’ve put yourself.
I like that feeling. I like the challenge. I like the thrill of making progress, and I even learn from the disappointments and awkward failures along the way toward learning how to progress more smoothly. But at the same time, I hate it. I’m in a hurry to get past the unfamiliarity. I want to know where the keys are and what works before trying it out. It is that discomfort, that uneasiness, the hunger for finding a place where I can achieve balance and not be confused or unsteady that drives me to work at it and not give up, but at the same time I need to be uncomfortable with it, to hate it and even dread dealing with it, or else I won’t have the drive to seek out the success that will eventually make it all go away.
It reminds me of being on the road, driving the big Chevy Express van we used to own to support our retail mom-and-pop business, and scouting out a new city for wholesale sources where we could pick up inventory that no one back home had seen or had access to, and getting the best price so that we could pay our way, make a little to invest back in the business, and pass along great deals to our loyal customers. There too, I loved it. It excited me, but at the same time it also stressed me out, filled me with anxiety that often made me nauseous. I drove on unfamiliar streets in unfamiliar traffic looking for an address or following directions over the phone to find a new wholesale outlet. There was always paperwork; there always was haggling over prices, and then I always had to analyze how to stuff the purchases into the van to allow for the most inventory to be added at the other outlets. The more I could fit into the van, the cheaper the trip was and the more successful our sales would be (if we had guessed right about the popularity of the new items) when we added the inventory to the showroom.
I loved knowing my way around, all the shortcuts, all the best places for bargains, knowing the best places to eat, in a big city, but it often became boring too. It was almost tedious after a while following the same patterns and same stops. Only new inventory being available made it remotely amusing. However, I never longed to be lost again, to have to search and drive around the block looking for an address only to find it closed. I never wanted to be that newbie again, but when it happened that we’d have to search unknown territory, I savored the thrill of figuring it all out, and I told my fears to take a seat on the bench and not interfere with my meeting up to the challenge.
That’s where I am with Steemit and with Kryptonia. I’m upvoting; I’m trying to make intelligent comments; I’m looking for worthwhile material to post; I’m following any familiar face I see that I recognize from Empire Kred; and I’m trying to resteem material although some attempts have been hit or miss. But just like riding a horse, I’m trying out new things and trying to keep doing what works, and every time the horse throws me to the ground, I’m dusting myself off and trying to figure out how to keep that from happening again as I climb back up onto the saddle to try again.
And that, I can say with authority, is how Steemit looks to this stumbling Newbie.
