Greetings to you all!
During my third year in school, I had a roommate, Thomas by name (not his real name though), who said that no lady could break his heart anymore because he had seen a lot of 'sheges' in the hands of ladies. According to him, he's no longer ready to fall in love; all he wants to do is 'smash and move'.
I laughed so loudly when he told me that.
"Guy, just pray that love doesn't come knocking; if not, you'll be arrested in a foolish way." This was what I told him based on my experience of falling in love.
He responded with, "I know how to handle this love when it comes, just watch me do the playboy thing this time around"
Meanwhile, we just moved into a new lodge with just six rooms, and three rooms were still vacant when we moved.
Two days after we moved in, we saw two ladies move down their luggages, and as we expected, they're the occupants of one of the rooms.
The night that they came in, we went to greet them for neighbourly stuff, and we helped them arrange their rooms as we never seized talking, cracking both wet and dry jokes, and they were laughing foolishly.
After we returned to our room, we heard a knock on the door, and it was the two of them with plates of food (rice and dodo). They said they wanted to show appreciation. We didn't hesitate to devour the food, not minding if love potion was added or not. We've not had rice and dodo for a long while. They stayed for a little until they left for their room around 10:00 p.m.
Immediately after they left, what came out of Thomas's mouth was, "I like that fair one.".
"Guy, they've charmed you with rice and dodo." I mocked him with a wizardry laugh tones.
I reminded him of how he boasted that no lady could break his heart, and he said the "like" he meant isn't for love but to 'hit and run'
The next day, while we were preparing for class, the fair One came again with a plate of fried plantains for us.
"Haaa! This love is too much." I thanked her as I collected the plate from her. I and Thomas ate it as a supplementary breakfast.
*Fastforward;
She kept serving us the plantains till Thomas fell completely for her, and they started to date unofficially.
How do I mean "unofficial"? It wasn't made public to us (I and their friends), they didn't even agree to kick off their dating, it just started like that, vibe on vibe.
I noticed that Thomas was already exhibiting some mysterious love wonders on her. I had to remind him that he once said that no lady can break his heart, and he responded saying that everything he's doing is just to find his way into her, to smash and run. I kept quiet and continued watching them like telenovelas.
Just a week into their love life, this lady started exhibiting the normal Nigerian character- billing. This lady would come for money for bread, tea, recharge card, and transport to school, and my guy was busy giving in because he wanted to smash.
At one point, the girl's phone got damaged beyond repair, and Thomas almost bought her a new phone if not for the fact that I shunned him and talked sense into him.
So, the girl collected Thomas's phone and inserted her sim in one of the sim pots, and she became in charge of the phone. If Thomas want to make a call, he would go and meet her to use his own phone to make the call. Fear love!
One day, this girl went to school with Thomas's phone as usual and didn't return.
We became worried because it was already 8 p.m. and she wasn't back. So, we used my phone to call her, and guess what? It was a guy that picked up. Jeeeez!
"Give the phone to the owner!" Thomas angrily shouted at the guy on the phone, and suddenly we heard a feminine voice say, "Hello."
She explained that they were having all night's church programme, which is why she didn't return, and pleaded for Thomas not to be angry.
Omo! Thomas had a sleepless night that day; he was just lamenting and hissing, out of pain and anger.
When it was dawn and she returned from her 'all night programme', she brainwashed Thomas, and everything appeared normal between them again.
As they continued, she was still billing Thomas, and he was already in deep love, although still looking for a way to smash.
Then, guys started visiting this lady, and they would spend almost all the day together in the room, which made Thomas run mad in different occasions and I always laugh out my assss whenever such situation is at play.
Cutting the story short;
Thomas had to confront her about her movements and how guys visit her regularly, and guess what the lady said? She said they (she and Thomas) were never dating, like they never agreed to date.
What a Premium breakfast!馃挃
Thomas, with tears in his heart, retrieved his phone from her, and that was it. Official breakup on the relationship that was never official.馃ぃ
What made the situation worst for Thomas was that, it was exam period. He witnessed the second coming of Christ that year.