It changed. How did it change was unspeakable, but it changed. I'm sure. The first day we met in the library. It was a summer vacation season. She was starting her college next year, which means she was a high-school girl. I was in my 27. In my 27, I was studying French philosophy, such as jacques ranciere, Baudrillard, Althusser, and Camus. You might doubt that if Camus was a philosopher ever, not a novel writer. He was a philosopher. I also did not know that until then.
She was walked to me and asked if I knew where the library was. I said we are standing in front of the library. She got red in her face and said sorry. She seemed she did not know what to add. Did you mean the one that recently built? I asked her. But she looked more embarrassed. She was looking around with haste. When she found another girl she ran to her. They exchanged some brief words then she ran into the library building.
I walked into the building too, to return books. So I saw her coming out of the toilet after a few minutes. She noticed me watching her on the porch. Then she came to me. Wehn I heard her saying thank you, I realized she was Japanse or Chinese. It was early 2010, so don't blame me for I ignored other East asian countries while I was thinking of her nationality. It was what most of Koreans limitation at that time.
Her name was Eri. Eri Ichidaka: She wrote me her name on the brown napkin of the cafe. I did not speak japanese, but I didn't want to loose her. Instead of embarrassing her by asking her age, I drew (19 ~ ) next to her name. It was not an understandable symbol for her, since whe was too immature. I asked her what she wants to drink in english. Mine was blended espresso, and her was grape fruit juice.
She asked me what I study. She also asked me where I am living. Probably they were her usual icebreaking lines in korean. Everytime I was asked, I wanted her to make an answer too. She answered with a smile on her eye. She was in her 19, just finished her highschool a year before. She was staying with her father, a professor in the computer science department. It was one year contract, so she just took a gap year. Well, you must be good at computer, said I. I meant to pull out a shy smile and 'Noooo... I am a girl.'. But the contrast to my intention, she said yes, three times, with some hacker's like smile.