What is Forrest Gump's favorite type of pasta? Penne
How do you blind a woman? You put a windshield in front of her.
""What did you do today, mommy?"" ""I invented names, like 'Grand Theft Anal' and 'Mortal Cumbath"" on Twitter, and you?""
What is the difference between a well dressed man on a bicycle and a poorly dressed man on a unicycle? Attire
My son asked if masturbating made you blind. Depends on where you're aiming.