What did the lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire? See ya next month.
""President Clinton, can you respond to rumors of renewed infidelity?"" The only woman in my life is my darling *squints at notecard* Hitlery
What do you call it when a crow throws a party and no one shows up? An attempted murder.
I accidentally dropped one of my husband's Viagra into my contact solution and now I'm cockeyed.
How does Hillary Clinton say goodbye? ""Seizure later!""