Don't you hate it when you're peeing and someone starts talking to you? It's like, keep your mouth open or it all goes to waste.
Why don't blind people skydive more often? It scares the shit outta their dog! - - - - **Now how do the blind people know they're about to hit the ground ?** The leash gets slack.
What do you call a deer with no eyes? Noeyedeer.
What do you call an anorexic girl with a yeast infection? Quarter pounder with cheese
After my girlfriend told me she was pregnant, I decided to start thinking about names. In the end I went for Juan Carlos and hopped on the next flight to Spain.