What's the difference between a Redditor, Marilyn Monroe, Melania Trump, and Lee Harvey Oswald? One's a jerk who jacks off, one jerked off Jack, one jacks off a jerk, and one's a jerk who offed Jack .
Valentine's Day makes me realize how single I really am. But I'm still gonna sleep like a baby knowing I'm not getting cheated on.
Apple bottom jeans... Boots with the fur... That's all you packed, Jessica? This is a camping trip. This is why we don't work as a couple.
When I was young I used to poke holes in my parent's condoms so that there could be someone else to do the dishes.
What Would The Rocks Boyfriend Be Called? Fruity Pebble..