Codependency: For the Loved ones of the Opiate Addict
We have talked about the struggles and tips for those seeking recovery for their opiate addiction in previous articles. Often times, the addiction goes beyond the addict and affects the people who love them. What happens when their love for the addict becomes an enabling toxic relationship? Codependency.
What is Codependency?
Codependency is a relationship pattern which sees one person putting another’s needs before their own. When codependency and addiction occur together, the two behaviours can reinforce one another. Psychologists have discovered codependent behaviour could stem from childhood experiences with addiction, current life situation, and possibly past addiction history.
Symptoms of codependency are:
Low self-esteem due to held feelings of shame,guilt, inadequacy, and need for perfectionism.
Strong desire to make other people happy and a difficulty saying “no.”
Difficulty creating healthy boundaries and distinguishing responsibility for actions.
Need to control people, situations, or their own feelings.
Poor communication skills
Obsessively thinking about other people and their own anxieties and fear
Having dependency behaviour and having inability to function socially when the other person isn’t around them.
Fear and insecurities with intimacy
Negative emotions such as depression or resentment.
Codependency and Addiction
A codependent will support an addict in unhealthy ways instead of setting boundaries. They could go as far as putting themselves in possible danger just to keep the addict happy. They will lie to others about the addict not having a problem and make apologies for their behaviour. The codependent will always think they are helping the addict when in reality they are not helping them get into recovery and they are damaging themselves.
Don’t give up! There is treatment for codependency!
While it may sound like you would be seeking treatment because of your experience with the addict, you’re actually seeking treatment due to your experience with YOU. Codependency treatment will help you lovingly set boundaries, learn to take better care of yourself, learn how to respond to addiction properly, and how to change your mindset with everyday life and relationships. If your partner is seeking recovery treatment, this is a crucial time to work your program as well. By both working on healthier life styles, you have a higher chance of continuing in a healthy relationship. Please note, it is always up to you and your partner to decide what you feel is right for both your well beings and you should never put yourself in danger to continue the relationship.
Codependency Recovery Programs
Fortunately, there are support groups to get involved in with people suffering similar problems as you are with codependency. There is a meeting to attend everyday in most areas nationally.
Below are links to find the next meeting in your area. We recommend you try out at least 6 meetings before deciding if the program is right for you.
Recovery.org – Codependents Anonymous
http://www.recovery.org/topics/about-the-codependents-anonymous-12-step-recovery-program/
CoDA.org
Another option is researching “codependency groups near me.” Your city may offer special programs that are not listed in the links above.
Resources
https://www.thecabinchiangmai.com/codependency-and-addiction-symptoms-and-treatment/
http://www.recovery.org/topics/about-the-codependents-anonymous-12-step-recovery-program/
https://www.rightstep.com/resources/dual-diagnosis-help/what-is-codependency/
This blog is dedicated to helping those struggling with addicted loved ones and was first published on my website Http://opiatealternatives.com
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