I guess I'd never looked at it that way. I mean I knew I was wrong but it was the fact that I'd been triggered by her lack of faith in me. My brain immediately brought to light something that I thought was in the recesses of my mind and I said it.

I still feel like I should have stifled that urge but talking about it now and admitting my faults is the final step I've taken to forgive myself about it since according to her, she'd forgiven me long ago. So I'm doubly glad now that I talked about it.

Thank you for these thoughtful words @futuremind. Maybe if you ever wanted a side job, perhaps becoming a therapist?🙃