"I can't help being good and it's so painful that people keep taking advantage of my goodness".
Chloe cried out to her cousin Jane who had come to stay with them for the weekend.
She wasn't the type who easily shared her burdens with people around her, not even her parents. She was always reserved and she couldn't help it too because it was her nature. she would always say.
She had always felt that speaking with people who aren't so close to her would enable her to get an unbiased opinion anytime she needs advice concerning anything.
Chloe had always been like that and lucky enough, it always worked for her and there was never a time she felt bothered about it. However, it wasn't the same with her cousin, she could always speak to her.
Chloe narrated to Jane that there was a time she got a job in a company. The first impression her boss left was a rude one, however, she never let that get to her. She did all the tasks that were assigned to her without complaints, even the tasks which weren't meant for her, she did them anyway because she was told to do them.
She would smile at offensive statements toward her not because she couldn't react to them, but because she understood that she doesn't have any control over people's actions and offensive behaviors but she has control over her reaction and response toward it. She also talked about another job she got which required that she arranged some dishes and assisted in the kitchen. Because of how nice she was, she never argued or complained each time other staff brought in more dishes that weren't meant for her to do, she just did them with joy.
All these things were what she tried explaining to her cousin because she felt that people were being unfair and taking advantage of the fact that she wasn't complaining.
"Jane responded,"
Chloe, I understand how you feel trust me, and I just want you to understand that people can be like that sometimes especially when their position is superior to yours. But here is what you ought to know, you don't go doing the laundry when your job in the company is to do the dishes, that doesn't make sense, and never agree to such for any reason because even if you agree to do it, they won't appreciate it, they would only think you're slow. There should be a boundary.
However, if a colleague of yours pleads that you help out with some of her tasks, if you wish, you may agree to it and if you don't you could decline.
What I'm trying to say should be applied in every area of your life. There has to be a balance, don't displease yourself for others unless it's something you want to do.
I will give you an instance. I traveled to a friend's place some time ago and I stayed there for about a month because of the stuff I was processing. I couldn't afford accommodation so my friend's place was the only option.
A week into my stay there, my friend's mom, who had noticed that I was always connected to the internet, begged that I turn on my hotspot so she could have an important message delivered to someone. I replied saying okay and had it turned on. After a while, she told me she was done, so I turned it off. Well, I had assumed it was just going to be a one-time thing but I was wrong.
Each day that went by, she would come to me and say, please don't be upset, can you please turn on your phone's hotspot.
At some point, I got to see that she had taken advantage of the fact that I was kindly always turning it on for her.
Do you know what I did?, She asked.
"No, please tell me". Chloe replied.
She continued.
"I could see that my friend's mom wasn't being considerate, so the first thing I did when she came to ask again was to tell her that I had limited data hoping she would understand, unfortunately, she did not, she kept asking."
I knew at that moment that it was time I used common sense. So what I did thereon was to change the settings for users connected to my device to 10 minutes. At least I knew I had already made things clear to her and whenever she connected her device, it would automatically disconnect after 10minutes.
So, Chloe, it's all on you, you can be kind to whoever you wish to be kind to but also use common sense because some humans can be very ungrateful.
"Thank you so much cousin, you're just the best. I know I can always confide in you and I would learn to use my common sense when I find myself in a situation that feels like I've been taken advantage of". Chloe replied.
It's okay Chloe, you're welcome. I should go get dinner ready, I'm starving.
(She smiled as she left the room for the kitchen.)