Hello! I hope you are doing well and still keeping yourself healthy and safe. I know that this crisis is giving everyone a hard time. I hope and pray that everyone is still holding on and still do everything to cope up. This is a very challenging time for us, but we need to survive.
Anyway, I’ll be sharing a personal blog on how I am coping up with this situation. Even though I doubt sharing and expressing my emotions to other people, I guess it’s time for me to just try and let myself be open.
With what’s happening around the world lately, I know I really need to do something to cope up. My mental health got worsen and I’ve been hearing too many noises that seem to take my sanity away from me. Even before the pandemic, I’m already an emotionally sensitive person. That started when I got depressed 3 years ago. It’s a long story and I don’t want to disclose it here.
I’ve been trying to do what might help me calm myself and below are the effective ways for me to cope up.
Writing has been my hobby ever since I was still in grade school. I would write short stories, a diary, and poems. I write stories in Wattpad before I got here in Steemit. I usually write in Tagalog because that’s what I’m comfortable with and I’m always conscious of my English grammar.
When I got into Steemit, it ignited my love for writing again. But It’s been more than a year ago when I left Steemit. When I left, I also left what I love doing. I’ve been keeping myself busy with my job and love life. But I feel that there’s something lacking within me.
I didn’t get myself into writing ever since I left the writing platform. What I commonly wrote were reports, memos, and job-related write-ups.
I once wrote a personal journal when I felt really terrible with myself and felt that all I wanted was to end everything. I burst into crying while writing that day. But after that, I feel relieved. Writing has been my coping mechanism whenever I feel down. And leaving it has made me feel emptier.
It was last week when I decided to try to come back into writing. And here I am in Hive, trying to write anything that I want to write. As I’ve mentioned I still doubt writing and expressing my own emotions here as I am not an expressive and showy person, but I’m giving it a try.
Coming back to writing has helped me cope up. I feel so empty before that even though I have more things to do, I still felt unproductive. I often feel drained because it seems like I ended my day by not doing a single thing that I want to do. Now, I’ve got more enthusiasm and I am more excited to wake up to do my job first, and just write or read whenever I have nothing to do. I enjoyed the time I spend on writing and reading.
It just feels right when you do what you love doing.
I am not the type of person who enjoys long conversations. I easily got drained when talking to a large group of people, and it’s always a challenge to me talking to strangers. However, I am happy that I know how to handle job-related communications. I also might be silent with other people, but to those who are close to me, they know how talkative I am.
Having someone to talk to is very important. I grew up not being expressive and emotional to my family, that’s why I am blessed having a boyfriend whom I can talk anything with. I am happy that I have someone to talk to everyday. That I can freely express my thoughts and emotions without judgment. And that I have some who always understands and helps me deal with my problems.
When the Enhanced Community Quarantine was also implemented here in our city, my anxiety has worsened. I was active in visiting Facebook before where I got to be updated with the latest happenings but got anxious at the same time because of the fake and violent news shared by almost everyone in my newsfeed. It seems like I was bombed!
So when I can no longer take the overwhelming noise from social media, specifically Facebook, I decided to deactivate my account and also temporarily unpublished my page for my business. I also want to deactivate my messenger because I’ve been hearing lots of complaints, but not hearing any recommendations in solving the problems. It seems that they keep on pushing issues and when a solution is made, it’s rejected without a thought. But since I can’t deactivate my messenger because it’s where we communicate with my colleagues, I just limit my time opening the app.
Not being able to control myself when I absorb other people’s emotions is a real problem for me. Being an empath might be a gift but is also a challenge to those who can’t control it. I am still trying to understand how to control it because I still believe that this isn’t a curse but a gift. I just need to learn how it works. And while doing that, I think choosing my media is the right thing to do. Shutting down and deactivating any form of media that you find unhelpful and affects your mental health is also better, whatever you think is best for you.
In my previous post, I mentioned that I temporarily stopped doing yoga and exercise because of my monthly visitor. A week of not doing it is also something that I missed. Being able to stretch my muscles and move my body helped me feel better. I feel refreshed after this morning routine. It helps me calm my mind and boosts my mood and energy.
Those were the things that helped me keep my sanity intact. I am happier I’ve got something to do whenever something wrong is running into my mind.
With what’s happening around us, I know we are all in the same phase today. Although everyone has a unique personality and coping mechanisms, it still important to be mindful and sensitive towards each other’s feelings.
I do hope that this crisis will end soon. That these trying times will soon be over. I hope everyone is also coping up and will continue doing what they love.
All photos are taken from Pixabay. Credits to the rightful owner.
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