RE: RE: SHATTERED
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RE: SHATTERED

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4y

I like some of the artful language you use in your story, diikaan@diikaan.

But I did not see the need to satisfy the stomach when the heart is aching. I did not see the need to pacify the flesh when the spirit is broken. Crumbling like a pack of cards, I fell on the bed again and the river of tears billowed.

These are insights into the character that help to fill out the story a bit.