May 27, 2022
Oftentimes, we consider one a blessing if we received it in a positive situation. But during difficult situations, we often become blind and frustrated. We become blind that we don't acknowledge the situation from a positive perspective as it impacts our life negatively. We become frustrated by the unfavorable consequences and consider ourselves unlucky or unfortunate. Little did we know that bitter trials are often blessings in disguise and some blessings are hidden in difficult situations.
It was eight months ago when I signed an unexpected visa extension due to some unfavorable situations. Sometimes, life is so unfair that when I finally made up my mind, that's the moment that another unexpected event would come wherein I would struggle with the decision-making again and I would sometimes end up taking the wrong one, especially when I need to give my decision too soon. When this extension was about to end, I thought I was ready enough to end my job, but no I wasn't as some things fall in the way that put me in a difficult situation.
During those moments, I felt like I was in a difficult situation that was tough to withstand as I needed to decide whether to choose my happiness over others. But I know that if I decide for my own sake, the other party would suffer. But if I decide for their betterment, I would suffer the consequences and carry the burdens. I even just wanted to shut my mind and I questioned Him, "among all people, why do I need to suffer much? Can't I just be happy?" That was when I felt so tired of my life and thinking about others.
*Image edited on Canva
This never-ending journey is sometimes suffocating, the same feeling when you are drowning in the water and you have no choice but to hold your breath and strive hard so you could reach the surface of the water and survive. If not, you would reach rock bottom. Sometimes it's also tough to balance all aspects of life due to unexpected events and unfavorable situations. It's actually so easy to deal with my own life if I would just think for myself, alone. But then again I need to take others into account.
I just accepted the fact that I will never live for myself and there will always be others on my back. Baggage that I would probably carry until I got brittle bones and white hair. What else can I do? This is my fate and I have to follow the trail of my life drawn by others to wherever it would lead me for their own sake.
I thought I will be forever stuck following the same path and just continue working for others until they told me to stop. I thought I will never enjoy this working life again. Until realization hit me and I can actually enjoy this life without worrying much about others, problems, and challenges.
When I learned how to endure and let go of the pain, I felt like I became far better off. When I accepted this fate and see life from a better perspective, that was the time I discovered the hidden blessing in that difficult situation. The situation helped me realize that it was just me who was making my life complicated and putting myself in a difficult situation where in fact, I could just enjoy my life without worrying about what tomorrow holds. Besides, "everything happens for a reason."
I just need to make all aspects balanced and not only focus on one. I shouldn't hesitate to let go of my heavy feelings and emotions as they would only weigh me down. I shouldn't hesitate to laugh out loud at the situation, especially when it seems to be out of control. They said that it would help us ease the pain and lighten our heavy feeling. It's pretty funny though thinking about why it seems so tough to laugh when we are in a difficult situation. And when we laugh people would think we are out of our minds.
But another thing I learned from these past events in my life is, "I shouldn't live in other people's minds." I shouldn't think of what negative things others would say about me, but rather just think of myself for as long as I am on the right track. Why would I live in their minds if I could live in mine? I have the utmost control of my life and my mind so I should create my own peaceful world. And most especially, I have the utmost control to dump whoever and whatever could create toxicity in my life rather than sticking with them and minding them the whole time.
When I acknowledged the purpose of this work extension which I thought was suffering, everything seems to fall into place. I realized that it wasn't a problem to be solved, but a blessing. And unexpectedly, the longer I stay, the more I appreciate and enjoy life. The recent events helped me open up my mind and see life positively rather than suffering because if there are millions of challenges in life, there are millions of reasons to live as well.
We just have to look from a positive perspective and appreciate life. We just have to be mindful of everything. We just have to learn how to deal with difficulties. Above all, we just need to learn how to live life happily despite the challenges thrown at us. Because even in the darkest hours, there is always light that would brighten our path to be back on track. And always remember that there are hidden blessings in difficult situations.
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