I saw him every day when I left work. He was a languid, sad-looking, cadaverous-looking guy. My taste in girls is quite different from that of other guys my age.
I have always been attracted to women with a certain halo of mystery, pale, inexpressive, looking like the living dead. The fact is that the image of that woman was deeply ingrained in me, wishing for six o'clock in the evening, the time to leave the office, to see her as I passed by.
As time went by, I came into contact with her, and I ended up, without knowing how or why, moving into her apartment.
I gradually fell in love with her silences, her rough hair, the smell of her sheets, everything about her.
I caressed her pale body while she slept, her bony hands, her discolored lips. I would revel in the sight of her nakedness.
Years went by and I felt more and more attached to her. When she was away, I would open her dresser drawer, stopping to look at the jewelry I had given her, the perfumes, the lingerie. I would walk into the dresser and see her clothes in front of mine, our shoes and accessories.
But grief was eating away at him and I could do nothing to restore his happiness. Sadness had taken root in her, as it does when we lose what we love most in this life, and I was not consolation enough.
One June 10th I followed him to the cemetery. He stood in front of a tombstone and burst into tears. I wanted to see for whom he was crying so emotionally and, there, written on the headstone, I could see my name, my date of birth and my date of death, the tenth of June years ago.
Then I relived it all, feeling it with as much intensity as when it happened back in the day. And I could remember that day when a vehicle rammed me as I hurriedly and improperly crossed the street, before the eyes of my lover who was waiting across the street to have a second passionate encounter with me behind my wife's back.
Now I wonder if that woman crying standing in front of the tombstone that covers my remains is my wife or my lover. Who have I fallen in love with again once I am dead?