I wish, It was a fiction

Life is not a bed of roses. Various kinds of difficulties come in life and we need to struggle to survive. It's the reality of life. With time we start to grow and we start to become stronger. As we grow stronger, the controlling power of handling situations around us also increases and we try to control the situation as much as we can. But sometimes situations go beyond our control and we become helpless because there we can't do anything to bring the situation under control. Such kind of situation can arrive maybe because of our incapabilities and sometimes It can be because of our fate also.

made by me using canva

In my life several times I became helpless but my worst experience was in the time of 2021. And I am going to talk about it now.

It was the time when my parents and siblings went to the village for some reason and I stayed in town because I needed to go to my tuition. I was in my tuition and after crossing 20 minutes I received a call from my grandmother (mother's mother) and she said only a few words to me which still rang in my head, " Your mother is feeling unwell and I hospitalised her, so come here as fast as possible". Immediately I stopped teaching and left my student's place. My heart started to beat faster and an unknown fear came to my mind. I wasn't able to control my bad feelings. Because of the traffic jam, I reached the hospital approximately 1 hour and 30 minutes later and each minute was like a day for me.

Reaching there I saw my mother was facing breathing problems. She had no such problem and a thing automatically came to everyone's mind and everyone guessed she was COVID-19 infected. It was quite natural. I also guessed it but I had no time to think about it because in that hospital there was not sufficient oxygen supply system and the hospital authorities informed us it would not be possible to continue oxygen supply and they suggested us to shift the patient to another hospital. My mother was suffering very much because of lack of oxygen.

Within a short time, we arranged an ambulance and immediately we took my mother in the ambulance. I sat beside my mother and my mother grabbed my hand strongly and it was the first time she grabbed my hand so strongly and said " Son, I think I won't survive. I am going to die. I can't take the pain anymore.". Hearing the sentence from my mother's mouth my eyes couldn't resist tears. I didn't have any words to console her. I could not do anything except watch her suffering. In fact, I could not do anything to reduce her suffering instead of she was in front of me grabbing my hand strongly.

At that time I felt like I was a useless child of a mother who had no capability to do anything to reduce the suffering of his mother. Even I was the helpless one who didn't have any words to console his mother. I kept quiet and reached another hospital grabbing my mother's hand.

Reaching the hospital when we asked for money for some days, many relatives refused to help. We were in the hospital and we came there suddenly and naturally, nobody kept all the money in their pockets. Besides, the treatment cost of COVID-19 suspects was huge. So after arranging the admit fee of the hospital, I needed to go to my flat to take money. Honestly, I felt very bad and angry that day because many times my father helped our relatives in such kind of situations even if they didn't ask for it. Those relatives acted like we were asking for money forever. Whatever, it was their choice and they had the right. Actually, they were afraid of COVID-19 and didn't want to meet with us suspecting my mother was COVID-19 positive. So even if I was angry at the beginning, later I tried to understand their situation also.

It was for the first time I felt afraid of losing my mother. The fear was at an extreme level and I was totally helpless. I don't want to face such kind of situation anytime. I wish nobody face such kind of situation 🥺. I wish whatever I said here would be fiction.