Ki'it thought ze was ready. Ze had survived Human Kev's "oops"es, learned to anticipate Human Lin's "I know what I did wrong!"s, and even managed to halve zer dosage of calming medication after a half dozen of Human Ren's "uh-oh..."s.
This, however, was zer introduction to the dreaded, "Wheeeee!!!! Again!" -- Anon Guest
[AN: You are of course free to use any gender-neutral pronouns you love in prompts... it's just that I cannot conjugate anything else than ze/hir. The rest of them just confound my poor old noggin. I am trying, but for writing, I'd rather stick to ze/hir. Apologies for the offence, dear readers]
Living with Humans is an exercise in unexpected stress caused by untranslatable noises. Not words, but nevertheless sounds that had significant meaning. Humans insisted that they didn't have a tonal language, but they could infer meaning out of "Hm" or "Um" or other nonverbal noises. Ki'it was learning to do that, since it was vividly important to know what each set of non-word grunts could possibly mean.
"Uh oh," was a trouble grunt. It meant, loosely speaking, "Something has gone wrong and might yet go catastrophically wrong." Which was a lot to cram into two syllables with a glottal stop.
"Uh oh," in Ki'it's experience, meant, "Make sure my livesuit is ready for urgent activation because the crazy Deathworlders have messed something up again." Again, a lot to cram into two syllables, but as warning signals went, it was very efficient.
Worse than "uh oh" was "Oops." Oops could definitely mean, "Something's catastrophically flakked up," especially when it was uttered by Human Kev. Human Kev's sole reaction to something about to blow up that he had caused was a singular "Oops." In other Humans, that single ur-word could mean anything from "I spilled a condiment," to, "That's going to hurt tomorrow after the adrenaline wears off."
Humans could and would say "Ow," about anything from an ignorable bump to a broken bone. It was allegedly part of their Deathworlder charm.
Of the nest of Humans Ki'it lived with, the non-verbalisations had something of a system. It was some of their verbal choices that were getting to hir.
For example, there was Human Lin, frequently found in an impact zone of their own making, also frequently found with minor injuries and a shocked expression. Their most alarming utterance after their self-initiated calamity was, "I think I know where I went wrong," before diving back into the maelstrom. Alongside that was Human Val's, "Let me check my notes."
It was possibly a good thing that their base of operations was on a planet with a breathable atmosphere. These Humans were catastrophic to their own habitation[1]. Ki'it was alarmingly growing used to it and only yelled at hir Human cohabitants when they put hir habitation zone and personal property at risk.
Then came the addition of Human Zee to the mixture. Human Zee was a younger Human and possibly one of the other Humans' progeny. Ki'it couldn't be sure, since the Human neophyte took to calling everyone by a parental honorific. An inclusion that encapsulated Ki'it as well.
All adults in the base were, according to personal identity, 'Mom', 'Dad', or 'Ren'. Attempting to deny the familial bond only resulted in histrionics the likes of which Ki'it had never seen before and never wanted to see again.
That wasn't the most disturbing thing Human Zee did or said. That alleged honour went to a summer afternoon when the entire pack of amphibious apes were cavorting in the local lake. It was a pleasant afternoon off from the usual chaos. Which meant that it was time for different varieties of chaos.
Human Lin, in the process of playing with Human Zee, picked up the child and whirled, throwing the youth up in the air to splash down harmlessly into the water. Human Zee, during their brief flight, shrieked in what initially scanned to Ki'it as alarm. Yet they emerged laughing and began swimming back to Human Lin. "Again! Again!"
The shriek, encapsulated in the Human parlance as, "whee," was not an exclamation of alarm but rather an expression of joy. During that otherwise pleasant afternoon, Ki'it got to hear a lot of, "Wheeee! Again!"
More alarmingly, one of the other Humans would later explain it with the words, "Yeet the child for their own health."
Humans were terrifying.
[1] Many Galactics are very alarmed to learn that this is a normal state of affairs with most of Humankind.
[Image (c) Can Stock Photo / haveseen]
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