A few days ago, I wrote a tweet that went semi-viral.
This tweet had around 100 retweets & 450 plus likes.
So it seemed like a lot of people liked it.
'That's great to hear.'
But something was wrong.
There was one comment that was mean.
Well, mean would be an understatement.
This dude pretty much called me a 'shithead' and said that I needed to stop lecturing him.
Funny thing?
The tweet was a life observation, not some call to action.
'Dang bro, were you upset by their reaction?'
Not at all.
I was quite relieved.
The reason why I was relieve was because it gave me the perfect topic for today's blog.
And that is in order to build your tribe, you need to be okay with hate as well.
Back in the days, I was the guy who would filter my personality to make sure that I was liked by everyone.
So I would do the exact opposite of what I deemed normal.
Instead, I would just agree a lot & act like a people pleaser.
Did I make friends?
I guess.....
'What do you mean, you guess?'
Well, I had quantity on my side, but for some reason, those people didn't feel like friends.
They were just a bunch of people that I had surface level bonds with. They had no clue who I was.
I was simply wearing a mask for approval, and all that bought me was despair.
A few years later, i switched up my strategy & thought, what was the point of having friends if I treated it like a job?
So I took of the mask and was reborn as my authentic self.
The nice guy had been replaced with the guy who would occasionally curse, crack jokes & aim to have fun.
Results?
A lot of people were rubbed the wrong way & distanced themselves from me.
But there were also a handful of people that remained.
And the ones who remained became my tribe members.
Since altering my strategy, my circle has reduced, but my happiness has skyrocketed.
I now have strong social bonds with my smaller circle.
At that point I realized:
You can only consider someone a friend once they have seen your authentic self on multiple occasions.
If you are someone who has been feeling lost in your social life, chances are that you've been playing it too safe.
And when you play it too safe, your inner 'nice guy' comes out.
But understand that:
-It is ABNORMAL for everyone to like you in the social world.
-It is NORMAL for everyone to NOT like you in the social world.
When you can really register this concept, you'll officially spark the attraction process.
You aren't chasing people anymore.
You are magnetizing the right people & repelling the wrong people.
Example: I have attracted you to this steemit blog where we meet daily. I have repelled the tityboy who got butthurt from my tweet.
Win-win if you ask me.
So in order to attract your tribe, you want to talk to a human like you've known them for your entire life.
That's when your most authentic side comes out.
It' is tough to do at first, but no worries, it gets easier with time.
All I want you to do is maintain decorum & express your honest opinion.
Whatever you do, don't be nice!!
Niceness will destroy your life.
Niceness will have you reflecting with regret.
Learn from my mistakes & graduate from this stage as quickly as you can so you can harness your confidence & build your tribe!
Till tomorrow my friend.
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