Well it's Monday so that means I am recovering from another heart attack. I could see why someone would think I were being overly dramatic and definitely redundant... but this shit keeps happening every freaking week!
Yesterday the Bears squared off against the Detroit Lions. What was on the line? For the Lions... nothing (except for maybe a bit of pride beating their old coach). But for the Bears, the game was incredibly important. If the Bears won the game, it would mean that they would earn the number two seed in the NFC. This would guarantee the bears a minimum of two home games in the playoffs... if they kept winning them while giving me heart attacks. In addition, if the Bears kept pulling rabbits out of their asses and kept winning while the Seattle Seahawks lost a game, the Bears would host the NFC Championship at Soldier Field in Chicago. Holy shit! That hasn't happened since... checks the internet... 2011. I actually thought it was much longer ago than that. So the Bears had a ton to play for and the Lions had very little. That is why the Bears played all of their stars while other teams around the league rested their stars. This includes the Philadelphia Eagles but more on that later.
So how did the Bears respond to this huge moment? By crapping down their leg for the first three quarters of the game. The Bears looked like the team who couldn't wait to get on the golf course. They did almost nothing right. Oddly the announcers kept praising the Bears for holding the Lions to field goals on their first two possessions. This was right after the Lions marched down the field and cut through the Bears like a dull knife through... well the Bears defense. Their defense is so freaking bad. If they aren't getting turnovers, they have no chance.
For the first three quarters, the Bears offense looked as terrible as their defense. So this means they looked like the worst offense in the league. They could not run. They could not pass. It was actually embarrassing. After three quarters of the Lions playing football and the bears wandering around like freaking idiots, the Lions led 16 - 0.
Wake me up in the 4th quarter.
But then the fourth quarter started and someone must have told the Bears the game mattered. The Bears scored a touchdown on a nice 25 yard pass from Williams to Walker with just over 14 minutes left in the game. They ran in a two-point conversion to make the score 16 - 8. Then the Bears defense did the unthinkable... they stopped the Lions! The bears marched down the field and scored another touchdown and then converted another tow-point conversion. With the score 16-16 the Bears had all of the momentum. They somehow stopped the Lions again. It seemed like they were on their way to their 7th (yes SEVENTH) win in the last two minutes of the game.
Sadly, no one told the Lions this. After another Bears defensive stop, they took over with the ball inside their own 20 yard line. Once again they ran around like idiots and failed to make a first down. This forced them to punt and it was the Lions' turn to march down the field to score with no time on the clock. So I had my 10th heart attack of the season (6 wins and 3 losses like this).
Apparently the Eagles allowed this guy to make the starting lineup on Sunday.
But wait. Remember how I mentioned the Philadelphia Eagles starting their backups? There was one other way for the Bears to back into that coveted second seed in the NFC. The Eagles had to lose to the lowly Washington Commanders. For some reason their coach sat all of their stars. Apparently not even the Commanders are bad enough to lose to a team of backups and they managed to win 24 - 17. that means even with the Bears horrible play, they somehow landed the 2nd seed in the NFC.
That pretty much sums up the Bears season. Are they the second best team in the NFC? Hell no! They don't even have the 2nd best record but since the Rams finished 2nd in their division to the Seahawks, the Bears get the nod. The Bears have had a few things going for them. Inconsistent flashes of an awesome offense that has created the most big plays in football, a defense that has created a ton of turnovers, and a shitload of luck. They are incredibly lucky. But that is part of the game. I doubt they will get lucky four more times this year, but who knows? The Bears have proven that anything is possible.
