I am currently taking part in a writing challenge that is a three week process culminating with a polished blog post or written material that is worthy of being featured, a “pinned post” longform content if you will. This is a brief overview of my experience and work on the challenge so far:
During my research and legwork for the writers' challenge, I looked at and thought about many things, went down numerous rabbit holes, and chased a lot of squirrels. I also drank a lot of coffee and spent hours deep in thought, searching online and using AI. It was during this time that I came across the fact that next week is Kindness Week (February 11th to 17th, 2024).
Being all about kindness, I wondered how I could have missed it. Well, it turns out, easily. I just have so many things going on right now, and when things run like a well-oiled machine, you can jump and change directions, multitask, and do all manner of wonderful things.
Indeed, I used to think nothing of managing two or three customers on a phone call, a couple in front of me in the store, putting out fires, answering other associates' questions, and more, all with one hand tied behind my back when I worked retail management. Well, not literally, but you get the drift.
The problem now? It is just that—things are different. Having a Traumatic Brain Injury, ADHD, and other health issues, coupled with being in chronic pain every day, takes a significant toll on what one can and cannot do. This includes both physical and mental capacities.
I have struggled to produce writing for my first week's submission in the writing challenge. I have had idea on idea upon idea upon idea, —you get the drift, right? A lot of ideas! But while having ideas is easy, almost too easy to the point of excess, turning them into a coherent piece is another story.
Having ADHD, ideas are like an internal popcorn machine inside my head; they pop and pop and never stop. They come so fast, so many, so densely at times that I cannot even keep track of the ideas immediately before the first 12 or so that I am trying to remember. They come so fast that they hurt. They never stop.
I wake up throughout the night with more ideas. I can be exhausted, and the brain will not shut up. It can be, and indeed is, extremely exhausting. And the real kicker—if I could harness just a small percentage of these ideas, keep them straight and organized, and maybe follow some through from beginning to end—it would be truly wonderful.
But ADHD and brain injury do not work that way. The mind will not be quiet, yet remembering anything becomes nearly impossible. No matter how hard you try, you just can't keep things straight. You get angry with yourself, thinking, "I will give myself a pep talk, or become a self-directed drill instructor, put myself through my paces, stop daydreaming and drifting off." But it is futile. It is about as successful as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. You get the idea!
Even on a good day, you can suddenly forget what you're doing or why you just walked into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator door. You might not recall what you did five minutes ago, what day it is, or where your glasses are. You could spend thirty minutes searching everywhere for your eyeglasses, turning things over and leaving a mess in your wake, only to suddenly realize that you are wearing them. And I'm not even joking about this.
So, I have decided and am hereby giving myself permission to be okay with whatever may come. I cannot guarantee wonderful words of wisdom, Nobel Prize-winning posts, a bestseller, or even a good blog post at the end of my three weeks. However, what I do promise is that I will try. I will make an effort.
I will attempt to remember things along this journey and write them down for use in the upcoming finished post. I will do my best, and that will have to be okay with me. Even if I struggle, scramble, and finish at the eleventh hour and fifty-ninth minute, I will try. And I will try again. That said, this shall serve as post number one, with more to come.
Oh, remember that popcorn factory of ideas and thinking I can still multitask? Well, I am trying to work on some kindness posts and a daily kindness challenge now, on top of the 1001 other things I have going on. Now, before I forget something or become distracted, what day is it today anyway, and where are my darn glasses?
Oh yes, that's right, it's deadline day, and I am wearing my glasses. That would be hilarious if it weren't also the truth, right? Stay tuned, and I hope you can participate in the kindness challenge as well.
Kindness Week runs from February 11th to 17th, 2024. It's time to consider how being kind can make a difference. There will be daily challenges to inspire acts of kindness.
*Images generated using Dal-e, I hold a commercial licence.
