Positional power and arrogance in professions are perhaps the most alluring arts of evil. Humans are by default power hungry bastards and flaunting the power to "make a point" comes as naturally. Things like humility, accepting mistakes, "it is normal to not know everything" run straight out of the window.
And from the experience, I knew how enticing power can seem. Like a devil, always whispering in your ears "show off your power/ use that to make a point/ make them admire you".
And trust me, I very much know how vigorously you have to train your mind constantly, everyday not to do that or to do the right thing, not to give in to that delicious taste of power even if you can slip through the accountability part.
It was a daily battle with the inner devil!
It is an utter astonishment to me when I see people go on saying things, even though they perhaps know (or maybe don't?) what they are saying will only make them appear laughable. Or perhaps, they expect the other person will not refute if not out of respect but out of fear?
Certainly, you cannot make everyone like you/ happy in professional life, but you can at least be rational, and capable of justifying your actions correctly, which is anything but biased.
Sometimes, I used to laugh when I came to know that my subordinates have a better understanding of my positional power than myself! They would never believe me when I say "I cannot really do anything even if you hate me as long as your work ethics are straight" or "I would not terminate someone just because I don't like them" or "I will make your life miserable if I don't like you"!
I know, by the book, if I wanted I could, which as I mentioned earlier, is such an alluring idea and so hard not to flaunt your power when you have it!
But, I have always wanted to be a leader not a master, who has the obsessiveness to be respected, flattered, admired even with zero qualities to be one.
I remember when I first became manager, I was so young to suddenly lead so many teams with absolute authority.
It was scary and it was lustrous!
There were people who believed they deserve my position better than I do, and my god, the diversity of conspiracy theories people had (which I later found out!!), the moment my arrival was announced, made me surprised and laughed, and does even now.
I was young, I was stubborn and sentimental, I wanted to make every single of them acknowledge me, not for my position or by fearing my positional power but why I am the chosen one even though they were available in the entity like old employees, seniors of my batch, professionally more experienced etc, which rationally impossible at a workplace.
I never understood why anyone would hate me, not even now, because I always consciously follow the rules like, "why be rude when you can be kind!" or "treat people the way you want to be treated".
Everywhere I went, I won and I owned.
Not because I wanted but by default.
Why?
Because I always thrived to find and spread the best of humanity inside out.
I am no angel, but I am a winner and I had to learn everything, all by myself, where morality and nature have been my teacher.
So, sometimes, these days, as I grow old and encounter things like these, I laugh and move on. I barely spend my energy in talking or participating, and I play like an absolute idiot because I decided to play the most foolish person's role.
I frown or laugh, and I withdraw.
It is peaceful and less energy draining.
All the contents are mine, until mentioned otherwise.
