My life has taken a different turn of events over the past few weeks, it's been hard, I have been learning and unlearning but I have managed to cope so far.
you may be wondering what changed?
Well, I joined the single wives club as my friend calls it.
The dictionary has a completely different meaning for single wives which I do not align with but her definition of Single wives are wives whose husband are in a different country or travels very often for long trips. You could call it, long-distance marriage
If I was told a year ago or even 6 months ago that this is the life I would live, I would sincerely laugh and telling you how ridiculous you sound just by suggesting it.
Before marriage, we had talked of relocating and ensuring we give our children a better life but when this talk happened, the plan was to travel together as a family, one of us staying back was never in the works.
Times passed and with the financial situation in our country ,we generally just dropped every plan about relocation but secretly I had it in my prayers because running a business or even working in my country is draining and barely profitable. I knew I wanted better and sincerely leaving in the country was our way out.
In the midst of our surviving and living one day at a time, my husband got a call for a job opportunity abroad and his presence was requested immediately.
This was a referral job and it was a juicy offer, it felt like a joke because we Didn’t even have the funds to get him out of the country within the one month time frame he was given.
It all happened so fast and in exactly a month, everything he needed was set and before I blinked my eyes I found myself living alone with my 10month old son just like that and my partner in a different country.
Just like that!!!!
I am still shocked how all these happened in less than 30days, I haven’t brought myself to accept my new reality, I have tried not to write about it, because it would make it so real but when I saw the prompt questions for the week by THE WEEKEND
Stop time
If you could stop time (and remain there) which year, moment, event or era would you choose, and why?
I knew this is exactly what I can stop time for Because it happened too fast.
Everyday to console myself ,I tell myself he is just out like every other day and maybe back home soon, till he is not and I go to bed and wake up......New day and hoping for the same thing over and over again
Don’t get me wrong, I am happy this opportunity came knocking, it is a step to achieving everything we prayed and hoped for but If you could stop time for a bit I would go back to when we got the call and request for him to come over for the job, the time frame was too short, we didn’t have enough time to bond and just be us, everyday day from that moment moved so fast with a speed of light that I can’t even remember having time to just enjoy being around my partner.
Maybe if we had longer time together I wouldn’t miss him this much, or maybe a little time to mentally and physically prepare myself for this new reality.
I spoke to my partner the other day, complaining about how it all happened so fast and how I wish we had more time and he asked a question
All the time we had together, what did you use it for?
I laughed because when he was around, I always looked for one excuse or the other not to hang out. not my fault but when we try to do something for ourselves just us, either the baby has a cranky day or we may have been exhausted from the previous day, we felt we had all the time in the world together so it was never a problem till reality set in.
I take the best unlooking pictures of partner, i deserve some accolades
If only I could stop time, take time back to maybe a few days before he got the call, enjoy every moment, and do all the amazing things we promised to do now the baby is still little, like photoshoots, taking the baby to the beach and all the amazing plan we had in our head.
My mum would tell me to relax if she read this, that he is only a country away and nothing more, although we have schedules to visit from time to time till we Make a decision on complete relocating, but for now, I am still taking in my new reality.
If only I could stop time, and give us more time to plan we would have come up with a way that we all travel together but like I said the time frame was too short to cough out all the money we need for a family move. So he had to leave without us.
Well, it is the sacrifice we have to make for a better future, it is sad and lonely sometimes but I have my baby, my courses, and hive to keep me busy and take my mind off the loneliness.