February 17, 1989
Today I decided, I have to end the life created. I have allowed this to pass for too long. The hate, the anger, the sadness is too overwhelming. It takes over everything. I get angry that I have to sleep, eat, and having to brush my fucking teeth. I hate the people I see outside my door, on the street, anywhere, for just being there. They exist, for I hate them. My sadness comes at night when I am finally alone. The thoughts come into my mind, like waves of an ocean, over and over again, the same scenes; yelling, the cruel words, the insults, the pain and the blood. Again and again, relentless, pursuing, determined to never, ever let go. It is maddening. TODAY. Today, I have decided to end it all; to change the color from black and red to yellow, to bright and beautiful. I have the plan, the items I need and most of all, the will; the will to cross over, to find the new path, to change my course. Today is the day I have waited and planned for months.
Today, I will kill my parents.
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This is a short story that I started on Steemit but never finished due to not feeling it was truly appreciated. I have about 8,000 words done on it and will more than likely do another 2k to 6k before all is said and done. They are done by days as it is a diary but I will add some days together after this feeler gets absorbed.
