It's been three nights since we ran aground here, and I'm glad to say the raft is almost finished. Seems I was just in time as well. Those three nights alone here helped make me see just how inadequate I am. I finally had a chance to get to know the man my sister married and all I'll say is that I'm thankful he's dead. I'm thankful I'll never see him again. Luckily, you hire me to build this raft for you. You don't even have to beat around the bush about it. You ask me to build it, then you give me the funds to do it. It's really such a simple thing to say and do, but this time it took a while before things began to fall into place. You see, I was not actually paid yet. That was a short term investment. They had given me a loan for this device I need, and I'll have to repay it eventually.
It's all part of the deal my employer pitched me: 3 months free service and then a full loan at 6.2% per month. I didn't like the deal, though, but I could see the logic in it. Still, long term loans and investments have a way of stalling before they ever yield the expected results. It's been three months since I've started working on it, and I didn't even have it yet. Then you came along and expected me to finish it before the sea swallowed your boat. I had to finish it when I did, but I swear I won't live to regret it. I'm not very confident about how well it will work, to be honest. I know the theories and calculations behind it, but they won't protect me from the dangers of this venture. Yeah, hazardous is the word.
I'm heading into the trackless abyss of the high seas. My employers say that there's a way to survive out there. They even gave me a map to show me where it is. I have a few fears about taking that route though. The map doesn't mention how familiar I should be with the waters that surround that place, nor does it give any indication about what awaits me there. Most of it is plain black, no words or figures to give any clue as to what it is or how to navigate it. The map is dotted with places I do know, and they do show the way. I could go and get there, to be sure. But I can't be sure if the place is there at all. They say I have to find the place.
The device is the key. That is the only way to save the human race from destruction by the beasts of the sea. These are the words I've been reading day in and day out for three weeks now. It's all I've thought about ever since I first read the book. I'm on a ship heading to a place I've never been to. My employers also gave me a small device that seems to have a small screen in it. There's a map of the world in there. I throw it back and forth from hand to hand to try and make my decision. I don't know what kind of decision it is really yet though.
I don't know if I want to stick to the journey my employers have planned for me. It's dangerous, but it can also make me rich beyond my wildest dreams. That is, if there's really any truth to all those things I've read. How do I know that my employers have any idea what they're talking about? If they do, don't they have enough resources to go and get themselves there? Then why are they asking me to do the dirty work for them? I'm not plotting to overthrow my employers. If they have what they say they have, I don't think I could do that. I haven't tried to find out what I'm up against yet, but my time will come. I have to go through the first leg of the journey alone, I think. I'm not scared, but I'm not stupid either.
I'll eventually get to the place where my employers sent me, and if it's there at all, I'll find it. I have to. If there is a place like that in the world, I think it's too important to mankind to let it be lost to him. And if not- well, they say
I won't survive the journey anyway. So I'll just have to take that risk and go. I've been writing all of this on a notepad as I make my decision. I still don't know if I can say it out loud, even to myself. I have a lot to think about. In the end, I know what I'm doing. There's nothing left to think about. I know what I have to do. I'm putting the notebook down, gathering my things and heading down to the ship. There's not a lot of rest left before I leave, but it's better than nothing.