In the secondary school, I met this very brave and outspoken young lady, who was(is) intelligent and beautiful. From my safe distance, I admired her and she was the perfect image of who I wanted to be. She was so fearless and didn't need anyone to defend her because she could effortlessly do that for herself.
I kept admiring because I felt she wouldn't want someone like me as a friend. Who wants a timid and unattractive girl as a friends? I couldn't blame her but blamed myself for not being her match.
Fast forward to SS class, hostel bed were allocated and fortunately, we became bunk mates and I was happy. We slowly became friends and what I wished for, came at my door step. I tried all I knew to do, to please her and I think I was successful because she became vulnerable and started sharing some of her struggles with me. It was then I realised that all I saw from outside were just mirage and cover ups for her weaknesses. I admired the fact that she stood up for herself and didn't let her inner struggle deter her but then I learnt something...
While we wish to be others, they wish to be someone else or even YOU. While we think that others have it all together, they look at you and think yours is just perfect. 'If only I can have Chioma's quietness'. Isn't it funny? We look at other people, envy them for looking so outrageously perfect and wish we could trade places with them, while they look at us and thinks of the same thing. We are insecure of other people who themselves are insecure of us. We suffer from low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence and lose hope in self improvement because we are enveloped in quiet desperation.
We all have our insecurities. Nobody is perfect. We always wish we had better things, better features, better body parts, etc. But life need not to be perfect for people to be happy about themselves.Self improvement and loving yourself is not a matter of shouting to the whole world that you are perfect and you are the best. It's the virtue of acceptance and contentment. When we begin to improve ourselves, we then begin to feel contented and happy.
