Hey y'all it's been a while! Guess what, I've been busy. Busy living. I've just found 99 ways to live. I feel better this month than last month. I feel better this week than last week. I feel better today than yesterday. Hurray! Isn't that good news? I guess I can attribute this freeing feeling to exercise. Like lots and lots of it. Lots of action like y'know, some proper sweating . Like Zumba ha ha ha. I just found a way to spend some of my free time outside work. And it turns out, exercise really works! So try it guys. Get off your couch and start moving. Move. FYI this is the best way to live.
“If you are depressed you are living in the past.
If you are anxious you are living in the future.
If you are at peace you are living in the present.”
― Lao Tzu
Unfortunately I don't have many pictures of me sweating so just use your imagination for now. I'm trying this new group and so far it is fine. A bit of real life social interaction is better than no real life social interaction at all. I already feel so grateful just with little talking, I mean that's how deprived I am. That's how isolated I am. Now you can imagine the great appreciation and intense happiness of someone who had been in prison for too long.
“Be content with what you have;
rejoice in the way things are.
When you realize there is nothing lacking,
the whole world belongs to you.”
― Lao Tzu
When I just let things happen, most of the time, situations just get resolved themselves. I realized that too much control on something just aggravate the situation even more. But why people are so impatient these days? Like they want to have this and that, wanna get treated like this and that, demanding others to be like this and that. One word guys, CONTROL. The need to control.
My life the last few months have been hell to be honest but I've gotten rid of so many unhealthy things (food, habits, uhmm people lol). Now I feel good. I'm going out there and I'm happy to talk to people and be curious about their lives without expecting too much. As we all know, expectations is the root of all unhappiness. We expect too much. We feel so entitled to have the best of the best. Welcome to the entitled generation. But guess what, I'm slowly letting go of this millenilish or westernish mentality (apparently it doesn't work lol otherwise y'all be feeling content with everything you have). I'm sticking to eastern values of inner peace and contentment (this is better!).
The thing is, I've been expecting too much. I've been focusing on the results too much rather than actually enjoying the moment and the process. The Taoist approach is to just let things happen. Whatever happens happen. Go with the flow. It's the journey not the destination or whatever you call it.
Now what does it mean for me?
This means...
I can trying cooking a new dish without feeling upset if it turns out bad. Because hey, I've enjoyed cooking it.
I can go on a date and just enjoy the dinner and conversation without expecting that this will turn into a romantic relationship. Without expecting that this guy should be like this or that.
I can go join a dance class or group and actually enjoy dancing. Without expecting that everyone will become my friends.
I can join a hobby group or something without expecting it to become my regular thing. Because hey, at least I've tried.
I can do better at work without expecting for a praise or recognition all the time because I know myself and what I can do. I can give myself a pat on the back when no one else can.
It turns out, life becomes so much easier when I focus on the moment and not on the results too much. I know I know I find this hard myself. Because I had expectations! I wanted to be treated nice. I wanted to meet nice people all the time. I don't want to waste money on buying ingredients. I wanted to become rich in the future and not become an old beggar on the street (nothing wrong with preparing but then oops I died). Ugh too much control and I am missing this moment.
There are things way way beyond my control, surprise lol. And the only thing I can control are my thoughts. Or my feelings at the moment. And today, I choose to feel okay. Not totally happy (because there is no such thing unless you choose to be super super dumb or live in blissful ignorance) but just feeling okay is enough. Peaceful and content.
Ready to take another day... just like my "Defiant Diablo", ready to take down the bulls you all.