Rushing out of my classroom cuz I'm late for chemistry, I collide into him.
My papers are strewn about all over the place.
He helps me gather them and hands them to me with a smile.
'Damnit', I say to myself, biting my lip in an attempt to stop my face from flaming.
"You'd wanna slow down", he says.
I just stare stupidly, lost in his eyes, his voice sounding like the best melody.
"Michael, baby, I was looking for you", came a voice from somewhere in the background.
I was shaken awake from my reverie as he was pulled into a tight embrace and a rather sloppy smooching session started before me.
My friend, Nikki, had taken over.
Of course, he was her boyfriend.
I was just the third wheel.
I hated feeling the way I did.
I wasn't supposed to have an irresistible attraction towards my best friends' boyfriend.
We made our way to our respective classes.
Days wore on, but my feelings never did.
It had been over two years, and all I wanted was to have him to me. Make him love me.
The three of us hung out together a lot, and they never made me feel left out.
I witnessed the fuss Nikki made around him.
I saw the annoyance flicker across his face when she behaved immature.
But he was unusually patient with her.
That was what agitated me.
If he could put up with her, what would it be like between us? I wasn't annoying, neither was I clingy.
This was unlike me.
I regretted feeling this way.
I still regret it a couple of months later, as I bite his lips.
I still regret it when I feel his mouth on me.
But it isn't our love that I regret. It's what I did to her. What I did to Nikki.
I don't remember how it happened. I don't want to.
The look on her face when she found out had killed a part of me.
I'd taken him away from her, and I'd never forgive myself.
She hasn't spoken to me since then. I know she never will.
Maybe it's better that way.
Because I get to have the man I always wanted.
'I hate that I am selfish', I think, but I can't help grinning.
He teases me playfully as he kisses my neck.
He's all mine now.
Sure, I can get new friends.
I regret losing her, but I just cannot feel bad about it.
What I did was right for me.
It's been ten years now.
Karma has its ways.
Today, I'm just an empty person with a lost love.
Oh no, he didn't leave me.
He left everything.
That car accident should've been fatal for both of us, but I survived.
"Maybe I was alive so that I feel the pain Nikki went through", I whisper, laying the flowers on his grave.
As I turn to leave, I see her at the gates of the cemetery.
I do not know if she has forgiven me or if it's her love for him that has brought her here,
But I can see that she's been crying.
"Nik", I call out.
She doesn't say anything.
She just wipes a trembling hand across her face and leaves.
And I'm left there, torn into a million pieces, yet somehow holding myself together.
Iam 