I have read so many views and opinions on the topic of having a joint account and some were just rants that made me laugh a lot, while others shared, their thoughts in the clearest form possible. Living in Nigeria, I do know that Nigerians can be wicked. Be it your wife or husband, we all have wickedness in our blood and it is the only thing that keeps us going. Our skins are thick enough to deal with the harsh conditions of our country because deep down… we are also wicked.
No man is an island
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I will start by highlighting that no man is an island. We human beings require support in all aspects of life. We are emotional and social beings, this instinct in us has pushed us to look for greener, better pastures as we call it. However, I would like to say that as an individual, a person among billions, you would be infinitely doomed if you cannot trust just one person. The subject of joint accounts sparks heated conversations where some are ignorant, cautious or just not interested in worldly views.
I will make this clear. If there is a fan club dedicated to kicking against joint accounts, I should be part of them but I am not because growth is necessary to anyone who wants to live the kind of life I see for myself. My father bled my mother dry because he had access to her money. He was able to ruin my mother’s finances because he had no idea how lucky he was to have her trust and had no understanding whatsoever of the kind of privilege that is. I will not blame him. Some people are just naturally stupid.
Anyway, I say this because even with witnessing what trust can do in a marriage negatively, I still chose to have a joint account with my husband.
Two at home is better than two outside
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We are both adults who can have decent conversations about money and reach a definite conclusion. As I stated above, we are human beings and we need help. I am my husband’s helper just as he is the provider. Therefore, pooling resources would be the best way to go about managing our household expenses. It is also a way to save better against emergencies. Let us say we want to buy a land or get a new house and do it without pressure for children school fees or whatever, this is where having a joint account comes in.
In fact, if he is okay with it, we would have as many as possible allocated to different priorities. That is the best way to go about it in my opinion.
Goals and Visions
I am an ambitious person and so is my husband. He and I have a mutual understanding of what it should be like in our future and we are both working tirelessly towards it. Having a joint account, I believe, would hold us both accountable to each other. Given that we have established trust and set our priorities straight, we would firmly and lovingly see to it that we both deliver. That is how I see it with him.
Foundations and Bonds
Nothing strengthens any relationship like communication and purpose. I believe that when a couple have the same visions and goals, love naturally falls in place. When that person is your ONE, it is easy to let them into your space. Having a joint account with my spouse is something I look forward to because I trust him to trust me to look out for him. I would not walk down that isle if I were not sure that I could lean on this person or trust him to value my opinions.
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In his post My Money Or Our Money..., my friend @george-dee mentions how letting his wife into his financial space did more good than expected. This is how you know it is right. That is what makes the venture exciting. You trust the person and no feeling is as sweet as that.
Cons in building together?
If you ask me the cons, I cannot say I know because all I see are the positives. I will never go through a divorce, my husband will be considerate enough to inform me of expenditures or ventures he is undertaking and I in turn will give him no reason to lose his trust in me.
If it is about privacy and what not, that is the reason for individual accounts. I feel a couple can still retain as much privacy as possible financially through having separate accounts but still work together to make their lives better.
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Trust. Uncertainty. Fear. The whole cons and disadvantages I have heard and read people count so far is divorce, irresponsibility and trauma. My question is, if we start life (or marriage in this case) with the mindset that something will go wrong, whom do we blame when it finally happens? If we are already thinking and dwelling on how much of a hassle it is to build with a person, do not bother getting committed to them. Of course, this is only my opinion.
In conclusion, there are no cons to having a joint account with whom I will be spending the rest of my life. As long as he hasn’t given me any reason to distrust him and rather shows me time and time again that I can lean on him, why the hell not?
This is in response to the Hive Naija Weekly Prompt | Edition 51. Not sure what to write about? The Hive Naija community is inclusive and give out interesting topics weekly. You can take your pick and write about it.