I'm Not Taking Pictures

But the staging area was adjacent to a military facility surrounded by barbed-wire fence. I figured since I already had the GoPro in my hand because I was seconds away from putting it in my backpack for the remainder of the day I'd get the Humvees on the other side of the fence right quick.



And the following two signs but that's it. I like occasional signage, they're resourceful like recipe instructions. I saw these next two just before the warning on the cover and decided it's probably best to cease photographing the Naval joint at Marine Park so I put the camera away. Put my phone in my backpack, too, won't be needing that today either.



Today I'm just pedaling. No stopping every couple minutes to take off my backpack, unzip the thing and grab the camera, turn it on, yata yata...

Partly cloudy and 80, a paved trail alongside and over the Tennessee River. Nature—can't tell if birds are singing in front or behind me. Random swarms of buzzing things I'm fanning from my eyes and ears and the only clock's in the sky.

But when I looked across the river I noticed all the housing projects. I think the city intentionally built homeless shelters on the side less accessible to separate them from non-picture taking, nature seeking cyclists like myself.

Poor bastards made me dismount like I said I wouldn't. Backpack, camera, power, again.

One more of the riverside projects. Next time you think you got the shitty end of the deal you probably did but at least you don't have to hike up and down the hillside to fetch water.



Then I saw an outlaw biker gang—the 1-Wheelers. I'm no bike gang rookie, I've seen enough documentaries to know cameras are a death sentence. But they had one of those drones that flies itself so I pretended to photograph the drone without them noticing I was photographing them. Mission accomplished. That and a back up cover image but that's it. Well and some Canadians but just them, nothing else.

And a bridge—Alcoa Highway at Tennessee River. I like bridges. My favorite kind span otherwise impossible connections between two points and adjoins them. Bridges make shit happen.

And one Blue Light Special but that's it, I'm serious. I heard about these things but couldn't find one, they're illuminated at night and everywhere now that I know what to look for. If for whatever reason you need immediate assistance in Tennessee and a Blue Light Special is around, push the red button and authorities will respond to that location.

And a dead pig. Look, I didn't want to see the thing either but there it was. I had to see it, so do you. Looked like a Schnauzer—relieved it was bacon. That's about it, pretty uneventful really, I only stopped for photos once or twice.

And a side profile of Bill—Ugly Duckling champion three years straight and a favorite to win it all again this summer but that's it. Nothing else.