I was wondering of what I can do useful today, but it was sharpening knives is what comes to my mind. In this house we have a knife sharpener but my folks do not really know how to use them, I mean they use it but the knives remain dull and hard to use.
When I would sharp the knives a few years ago it always turns razor sharp because I also use that steel sharpener at the end after sharpening it to a stone sharpener. It takes a bit more time to do a knife-sharpening job especially if the knives had been dull for a while because you have to take off a considerable amount of metal for the knives to become more better to use.
Only now I could not do that kind of an activity because even sitting up would kill my back then. But now I think I can do it again because my back is getting some improvement. But I was thinking too that I am not the one cooking the food in this house so why would I bother sharpening the knives?
Anyway I was thinking of things I would like to do today but I guess other than sharpening knives, nothing. I cannot cook, I cannot clean my room, sweep the floor, clean the divider, re-arrange the things around the house.
But my house anyway is really ugly, no matter how you would organize things there are many things in it that is really an eyesore because my father is a hoarder too, lots of unneeded things stored everywhere. I once had cleaned the space under the kitchen sink but now there are so many things that is under it again.
Well I cannot just go and get up and throw away things because again I cannot even move my body normally. So it is one of my frustrations to not really do what I wanted to do and I am left with just nothing to do because of my disabilities. There are a lot of "if only" things that comes into my mind but I just have to accept the fact that I am just disabled.
But I am still hopeful that I can be able to do the former things that I enjoy doing. It will take more time indeed and many prayers from the friends that cares for me and a grace short of a miracle from God for me to be able to revolve my life into a better condition, I guess that I will have to wait.