Wow, things have been a fucking roller coaster. I haven't been writing as much and I have a surprising amount of acceptance about that. I have been taking care of practical life stuff really well. I have attended meetings bi-weekly. I have told lots of people, and will tell my family soon.
I'm so fucking proud. I've had such a difficult six weeks, but I can see how life will be better throughout recovery.
I have had some intense urges, but even they are subsiding more and more. I don't feel scared to be on my computer alone for fear of playing online poker. When I think of it I get such a rush, but it doesn't feel worth it at all.
Today, I did not gamble.
Today is a good day.
