Now that I think about it, it wasn't necessary. I should have waited or maybe slowed my roll. I met my boyfriend when I was fresh out of secondary school, he was already in the university, 300 level.
We were both indigenes of the same town, and I met him through my elder sister's then-boyfriend. He tagged along one day with his friend, my sister's boyfriend, and, took a liking to me. I was impressed and I felt flattered cause this man could dress and his cologne made me feel light headed, I loved it. Besides, a 300-level student liking me was a big flex. It certainly meant an upgrade from my mates that I dated.
I'm not an expert on male dressing, but believe me when I say he always checks all his fashion boxes. I could have given an accurate description, but there are some details I wouldn't do justice to. You will have to take my word for it, I was there, and you weren't, lol.
One thing led to the other and we started dating. I gained an admission into the university soon after and I was relieved that I could finally have the freedom to spend time with him. I won't have to sneak around for fear of getting caught anymore.
The school I gained admission into was in a different state, but even wild horses couldn't have stopped me. I would pack my bag every weekend and off I would go to be with my boyfriend.
I even cut it close on one occasion, I arrived on the exam day one time and would have missed the paper had I been a little later. We loved each other that much and the goodbyes were emotionally painful. Love is blind they say, but I completely disagree. The people in love are blind and love aids them to make stupid decisions. Wherever you see love, kindly hold it down and report to the nearest police station, it deserves to rot in jail. It's been confirmed guilty of abetting people to do irrational things.
The foolish act of mine cost me extra years in school, I wasn't the only girl in love, but my brain didn't even bother to multitask. The only thing I had in my head was always plans for the next weekend when I could be with my boyfriend again.
It cost me a lot, my actions were inexplicable and I have only myself to blame for it, I paid the price and in full might I add. I think the universe even threw in interests for good measure.
What did we spend every weekend doing? Even if you didn't wonder, I would have said anyway. Parties! It was usually from one club to the other and I loved it. I was a party animal and I had a well of inexhaustible energy to dance all night. It's okay to have fun and loosen up, but I didn't balance it at all. It badly affected my academics and it waited patiently for me to come back and pick it up from where I left off.
The most annoying part? We didn't end up together through no fault of either of us. There's no excuse for what I did, costing my parents extra money for school fees, abandoning my studies to follow a man and endangering my life every weekend just to get laid and party like an idiot. Do I regret it? Goes without saying, I regret it very much. I could have done things differently and paid more attention to my studies.
Just last week, someone invited me to a party and I vehemently refused. I stopped going to parties a long time ago. Whoever knew that I would have more than enough time and not need permission from anyone before I go out and I would refuse it? Even I almost couldn't believe myself.
I wish I had known earlier that a time would come when I wouldn't be freaked by parties anymore. The only party I attend now is one with my kids, indoors where we just Netflix and chill. I don't even have the energy for parties anymore.
If I could turn back the hands of time, I would have made changes. That being said, experience still remains the undisputed best teacher. I learned a lot of things from that phase in my life. My kids will be schooled better on making impactful decisions for their lives. It is what it is, the past is the past. I have regrets, but I'm aware of what I won't do anymore.
As long as I see the breaking of every new dawn, there's always an opportunity to make amends and get it right.
